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cerealman

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cerealman
  • Town/Country : Wisconsin, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1393
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About cerealman : Uhm, 15 almost 16. I love music, no joke. That's about it. I'm a pretty boring person I guess.

Never mind. I'm 16 now.
Never mind. 17 now.

cerealman's last visitors

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cerealman's FML badges

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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cerealman's favorite FMLs

Today, I switched from pads to tampons. It took me several botched attempts trying insert one before I succeeded, and now I feel like I've just raped myself. FML

#18814672
325 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32739) - you deserved it (11618)

On 01/15/2012 at 1:17pm - intimacy - by lolwut - United States

Today, I was walking to the bus stop when someone slapped an innocent person in the face with a fish. I was that innocent person. FML

#18812835
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29099) - you deserved it (3151)

On 01/15/2012 at 5:24am - misc - by lolwtfbbq444 - Australia

Today, this girl I liked made her Facebook status "Nobody texts me anymore, message me numbers?" I commented that I texted her. She deleted it and changed it to "Nobody that I care about texts me anymore, message me numbers?" FML

#18811640
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36106) - you deserved it (3218)

On 01/15/2012 at 1:24am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I came home to my fiancé and his mates playing Monopoly naked in our backyard. FML

#18803544
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21968) - you deserved it (2968)

On 01/14/2012 at 6:42am - misc - by anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I met my son for the first time since I had to put him up for adoption over two decades ago. I wanted to make amends and get to know him. Instead, all I got to know was how well he can throw a punch. FML

#18799303
347 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19236) - you deserved it (49608)

On 01/13/2012 at 8:38pm - kids - by me (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I had to bail my drunk husband out of jail after he and his best friend tried to steal a police horse from an officer. FML

#18745926
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22107) - you deserved it (2941)

On 01/08/2012 at 12:42pm - misc - by bellaskyeb - United States

Today, I couldn't contain my laughter when a patient told me she'd named her unborn daughter Twinkie. FML

#18728006
398 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25775) - you deserved it (3601)

On 01/06/2012 at 5:49pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my dog started limping as we were walking home. I thought she'd hurt herself, so I picked her up and carried her home. Once we arrived, I put her down, at which point she ran around and played as if nothing had happened. I fell for my lazy dog's plan to get me to carry her home. FML

#18697253
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22427) - you deserved it (5961)

On 01/03/2012 at 2:44pm - animals - by vanessa560 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was taking people's orders at the drive-thru. I was confused as to why people were screaming their orders at me, until one of my managers handed me a paper that he'd found taped to the menu, saying "speak loudly speaker isn't working properly." Punkd. FML

#18649632
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21252) - you deserved it (2644)

On 12/30/2011 at 12:38am - work - by Ashton Sprunger - United States

Today, I attended my extended family's Christmas dinner. All throughout, my grandmother kept complaining about how the food tasted like crap, and making sexual remarks such as how "the stuffings were far better in my day, if you know what I mean." FML

#18608467
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21017) - you deserved it (2376)

On 12/25/2011 at 3:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, I saw my dad sitting in the car alone, blaring classical music, blowing up beach balls. FML

#18583551
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19753) - you deserved it (3461)

On 12/22/2011 at 9:58pm - misc - by bellerz14 - United States

Today, my parents were coming to visit me at my brand new apartment. I made dinner and served them the cake my roomate had left for me in the fridge. Thirty minutes after they left, I was so baked that I couldn't think straight. I still don't know if my parents made it home. FML

#18579511
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28289) - you deserved it (7441)

On 12/22/2011 at 1:11pm - misc - by Cookie (woman) - South Africa

Today, I went with my friend door-to-door selling chocolates. We went to the first house, and the guy decided to buy a chocolate from each of us. He didn't have change and neither did we, so he just took the chocolates and slammed the door in our face. FML

#18548047
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19893) - you deserved it (5939)

On 12/18/2011 at 8:52pm - money - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got screamed at, threatened, cursed, and spat on by an elderly couple for "running them off the road". I was driving an ambulance, lights and sirens on, with a 4 year old in the back who couldn't breathe. They were going 20 in a 50mph zone for 2 miles straight. FML

#18542050
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44744) - you deserved it (1985)

On 12/18/2011 at 2:44am - work - by Sedici - United States

Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML

#18531059
182 comments


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