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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 17 March 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1129
  • Number of comments : 93
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 24 posted

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celinadepp's page activity

Visits<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 10:02pm<b>TeenageMix</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 5:32pm<b>Faddyy6</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 2:33pm<b>Tr0ub3l</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 4:51pm<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 1:28pm<b>Whoop_whoop</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 6:59pm<b>andy594328</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 8:59pm<b>sarkycow</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 3:39am<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 7:16am<b>barneystinson45</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 1:33pm<b>wang33334</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 1:54pm

celinadepp's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!


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celinadepp's favorite FMLs

Today, I heard a noise outside in the middle of the night, so I went out for a look. I'm also pregnant and can't stop farting. I get 2 steps outside and accidentally let a huge one rip, then, from the shadows I hear "Oh my god!" and then running in the opposite direction. I farted away a prowler. FML

by Gassy / 09/21/2015 at 10:45am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I dropped my phone in the toilet in a public restroom. That would have been bad enough, without the guy in the next stall saying, "Jesus! What the hell did you eat?!" FML

by AK-47 / 07/17/2015 at 7:04pm / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went downstairs early in the morning to watch a movie. As I walked into the living room and reached for the light switch, I heard my dad say "Knew you'd change your mind. Get them panties off." followed by the sound of a zipper being undone. I've never been so mortified in my life. FML

by Anonymous / 07/15/2015 at 12:29pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boss told me I ask too many questions and that's why they cut my hours in half. Officially, I'm a "Pharmacy Technician in Training", which means I'm trying to teach myself how to do the job without killing someone. All from on the job experience and an outdated textbook. FML

by PharmSlave / 05/01/2015 at 2:12am / United States (Washington) / Work

Today, in an attempt to be romantic, I kissed my husband as passionately as I could. After, he looked at me and said, "You taste like Chinese food." FML

by TimJack18 / 01/04/2015 at 6:14pm / United States (North Carolina) / Love

Today, I found a book in my attic that I always read when I was a kid. For old times sake I read it again. On the very first page, child me had written, "Go to page 15" so I did. On page 15, in big red letters, it said, "Get bent". I got pranked by myself. FML

by Deadpool434 / 10/19/2014 at 3:27pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had an important oral report to deliver with a partner. Not only did he come in late and high, he pronounced Virginia as "Vagina" the whole way through. FML

by Jamestown of Vagina / 09/13/2014 at 10:36am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my sister felt guilty and told me about the changes she secretly made to my résumé months ago. She'd put "doing your mom" and "corporate espionage" as my hobbies, and "Justin Bieber's pussy waxer" as a previous job. No wonder I'm still unemployed. FML

by fuck you, tasha / 08/24/2014 at 5:50pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Work

Today, I was hammered, and on my way home I walked into a policeman. My logic was: if I'm on the phone, he can't talk to me, so I pulled my phone out and started speaking. The officer then asked me why I was speaking to my wallet. FML

by drunk under 18 teenager / 08/19/2014 at 9:37am / Morocco (Marrakech-Tensift-Al Haouz) / Geek

Today, while taking out the trash, I swung the bag back and forth, which caused it to slide across my leg. An opened aluminum can inside the bag ended up slicing through my calf, causing heavy bleeding. Baked beans sent me to the hospital. FML

by winstonweigand / 08/14/2014 at 6:40pm / United States (Washington) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I got a new dentist. You know how most dentists play soft, relaxing music? Well this guy seems to like rap a lot, and it's kinda hard getting your teeth cleaned to the sound of bullets going off. FML

by randomusername99 / 05/05/2014 at 5:51pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, things were getting heated with the girlfriend. We were mostly naked, but mostly wouldn't do, so I kissed her deeply and whispered into her ear, "You should lose some weight". Clothes. I meant to say clothes. FML

by Spooprfailed / 04/08/2014 at 1:32am / Canada (Manitoba) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my in-laws kept mocking me for being "too clean" because I take a shower every day. They think I'm weird and kept saying things like "Be careful when you hug your daughter, she might squeak!" and calling me names like "water-wasting bitch." They haven't stopped all day. FML

by Anonymous / 02/12/2014 at 12:26pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to go tree shopping with my dad and some of his work buddies. It hit its lowest point when one loudly told us about a crap handjob he got recently. "I mean yeah, choke the cock," he said, "but don't choke it to DEATH, nam'sayin'?" I'd never wanted to just drop dead more. FML

by ANONYMOUS -_- / 12/15/2013 at 12:18pm / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous

Today, as my wife and I were getting intimate, I thought I would try a little "dirty talk". I whispered in her ear that I would "dick her down good". She couldn't stop laughing. FML

by Something I said? / 11/05/2013 at 10:26am / United States (New York) / Intimacy