Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

cdw2014

Search for a member

cdw2014

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 108
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

cdw2014's page activity

Visits<b>colby6666</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 4:13pm<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 9:12am<b>thxnder</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 3:11pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 9:59am<b>WorldWarAres</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 12:16am<b>FrostyKittens</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 2:49pm<b>EnmaYamato</b> - the 03/31/2014 at 5:18am

cdw2014's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of cdw2014's badges

cdw2014's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke to my drunk mother trying to vacuum the lawn. FML

#21147237
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46663) - you deserved it (4000)

On 05/21/2014 at 12:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I was chewed out by a lady who claimed the laptop she bought wouldn't turn on, and that she wanted a refund. She yelled and shoved the laptop at me, not even listening when I told her I didn't even work at that store. FML

#21143801
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49615) - you deserved it (3879)

On 05/18/2014 at 10:14am - misc - by lemongrab (woman) - Canada

Today, I received yet another rejection letter from a college I'd applied to. After crying for a week about how lousy I felt, my older sister gave me all 6 of the acceptance letters she'd been hiding. Turns out she's been forging rejection letters and keeping the real ones in her room. FML

#21140332
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66697) - you deserved it (4940)

On 05/15/2014 at 1:40am - misc - by livingamongtheflowers - United States

Today, I'm moving. While packing, I realized I hadn't seen my cat in a few hours. I called her and realized she was inside one of the hundreds of boxes in my house. I accidentally packed my cat. FML

#21139824
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40971) - you deserved it (15291)

On 05/14/2014 at 4:43pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I went to a restaurant with my friend, where my credit card got denied in front of everyone. The staff teased me and made me sit in the restaurant while my friend begged for money outside. FML

#21138924
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41931) - you deserved it (7413)

On 05/13/2014 at 6:37pm - money - by Harry (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boss fired me after chewing me out for the horrible date he had with my mother. FML

#21138556
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46487) - you deserved it (4039)

On 05/13/2014 at 10:29am - work - by fired (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, me and the guy I was dating ran into my sister at the mall. He took one look at her and mumbled, "Great, I chose the ugly one" under his breath. FML

#21137666
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57776) - you deserved it (5616)

On 05/12/2014 at 12:01pm - love - by bambam - United States (Texas)

Today, my daughter was scared to go to the bathroom because she thought there was a person behind the shower curtain. There actually was a person behind the shower curtain. FML

#21137389
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58630) - you deserved it (5029)

On 05/12/2014 at 1:17am - kids - by kids -

Today, a guy asked for my number at the grocery store, but I politely told him I wasn't interested. He followed me home and took a shit on my doorstep. FML

#21137065
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51604) - you deserved it (7174)

On 05/11/2014 at 8:14pm - love - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Hawke's Bay)

Today, I started going on and on about dogs and their different types of breed, behaviours, expectancy, etc. When someone asked me how I know all this stuff, I meant to say, "I fucking love animals", I didn't think it through and said, "I love fucking animals". FML

#21131182
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46938) - you deserved it (17854)

On 05/05/2014 at 3:53am - intimacy - by Zekrome - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I met up with my group for class. We were doing some final checks on the project we've been working on all semester, when I realized something about one guy's work seemed off. I googled it and found out it's almost completely plagiarized. It's all due in the morning. FML

#21130579
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40366) - you deserved it (3644)

On 05/04/2014 at 2:57pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I asked my son to go to the grocery store across the street and pick up some lettuce. He sighed and said, "Why don't you just order it on Amazon?" FML

#21124599
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41988) - you deserved it (6626)

On 04/27/2014 at 7:01pm - kids - by nh-Amazon - United States (Texas)

Today, I lied to the cashier at my local store, saying that I was "nominated to buy the candy for the party" when in actuality I went home and gorged on it alone. FML

#21116013
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36444) - you deserved it (12097)

On 04/18/2014 at 1:37am - misc - by Fatass - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I woke up with horrible pain in my gut. It got worse and worse, and I started vomiting from the pain. My mom said it was flu and that I needed to "man up." It turned out to be appendicitis, and I'm now typing this from my hospital bed. FML

#20777668
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51947) - you deserved it (2753)

On 07/12/2013 at 1:28pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, after much reluctance due to fear of causing a huge debate, I finally posted something on Facebook about the presidential debates. However, the post sparked an argument with my mom's childhood best friend, that ended with her telling me that my dad isn't actually my dad. FML

#20120633
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26557) - you deserved it (3116)

On 10/17/2012 at 2:22am - misc - by bastardchild_01 (man) - United States (Louisiana)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: