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cdlt1983's FML badges
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
cdlt1983's favorite FMLs
Today, the play I was directing opened. The curtain opened, and my lead actor and actress weren't prepared. I could tell from the looks on their faces as the whole audience saw him balls deep in her, doggy style, on stage. FML
by headinabag33 / 02/14/2016 at 8:57pm / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 01/09/2016 at 9:17pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
Today, I recently burned both my hands at work so I had to ask my husband for help changing my tampon, but he refused saying it would make him feel sick. This from the man who routinely sticks his tongue in my asshole when we have sex. FML
by anne / 01/07/2016 at 7:00am / Germany / Intimacy
by Xandriajoy10 / 01/04/2016 at 12:21am / Australia / Kids
by Anonymous / 01/02/2016 at 5:31pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, I visited my boyfriend's uncle's house for a party. His 8 year old cousin started asking if I like penis, so my reaction was to laugh, spitting my drink on her and her new dress. She can't pronounce peanuts, and I can't visit anymore. FML
by me / 01/02/2016 at 3:25am / United States (Louisiana) / Kids
by fredfredburger / 06/25/2014 at 1:45pm / United States (Missouri) / Love
by Anonymous / 06/23/2014 at 3:52pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I received yet another rejection letter from a college I'd applied to. After crying for a week about how lousy I felt, my older sister gave me all 6 of the acceptance letters she'd been hiding. Turns out she's been forging rejection letters and keeping the real ones in her room. FML
by livingamongtheflowers / 05/15/2014 at 1:40am / United States / Miscellaneous
by taintedlover / 05/13/2014 at 5:31pm / United States (Washington) / Love
by Lookalike / 05/12/2014 at 10:38am / United States (West Virginia) / Miscellaneous
by vivelawank / 05/10/2014 at 4:52pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy
by HeyTherexxx / 04/20/2014 at 9:02pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Ow / 04/18/2014 at 7:09am / United States (Arizona) / Health
by DisturbedMan / 01/15/2014 at 5:29pm / United Kingdom (Kent) / Intimacy
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…
- Today, I couldn't get into my car. I got mad at the lock, and my key broken inside it. It wasn't my… Today, I’m teaching French in a university in India. One of the students asked me if Paris was the… Today, I’m a French teacher abroad, and as my beard has a huge hole near my chin, my students call…