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cberry313's FML badges

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cberry313's favorite FMLs

Today, I picked up a lady's dropped wallet and chased after her despite my sprained ankle. When I finally caught up with her, she smashed her chili sauce filled hotdog across my face and kicked me in the groin, accusing me of stealing her wallet. I was kept at the police station for 3 hours. FML


I agree, your life sucks (37277) - you deserved it (2646)

On 09/06/2011 at 3:40pm - misc - by fmlsrslyahhh - Singapore

Today, I was brushing my teeth. As a bent down to spit my mouthful of toothpaste into the sink, my cat decided it would be a good time to stick his head right where I was spitting. I spit a huge glob of toothpaste on his head. He then shook it off all over me and the walls. FML


I agree, your life sucks (27655) - you deserved it (8180)

On 05/13/2011 at 11:41am - animals - by toothpastecat (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had a wet dream about having sexual relations with a rubber duck. FML


I agree, your life sucks (33120) - you deserved it (9483)

On 10/09/2010 at 1:15am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, I realized how fat I really am. While going to the bathroom I leaned to the side to wipe my butt and heard a crack. Not knowing what it was, I continued to wipe. After I finished, I got up to see that I'd cracked the toilet seat in half. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24106) - you deserved it (56296)

On 07/09/2009 at 2:21am - health - by Fattypatty (man) - United States (California)

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  • Hi gang! It’s a day of national pride over near the FML offices. There's a time for everything, and even if the desire to piss about to release the tension is huge, we mustn’t forget that we can…

Friday 27 November 2015

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