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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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caticaticati

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caticaticati
  • Town/Country : Ramsey, United States
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 21 July 1991 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 6805
  • Number of comments : 200
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About caticaticati : My head is on straight and my heart is too big.

caticaticati's last visitors

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caticaticati's favorite FMLs

Today, I noticed a cute girl in the checkout lane at the store. Feeling a little flirtatious, I decided to blow a bubble with my gum to get her attention. I accidentally shot the gum out of my mouth onto the guy next to me, spitting all over myself in the process. FML

#9134827 (235)

I agree, your life sucks (6335) - you deserved it (23647)

On 03/16/2010 at 4:12pm - love - by splitzville (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, while making out with my boyfriend, he started playing with my nipples. Suddenly he stops kissing me, looks at my nipples and says, "Have they always been like this? They look like joysticks!". He then started singing the Super Mario Brother's theme song and playing the game with my nipples. FML

#9086835 (241)

I agree, your life sucks (19045) - you deserved it (3546)

On 03/14/2010 at 10:09pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was in bed with my boyfriend, in the middle of foreplay, and somehow out of my mouth came, "I want to be inside you." I'm a woman. FML

#9066532 (183)

I agree, your life sucks (14116) - you deserved it (6608)

On 03/14/2010 at 3:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my dad asked me if I could convince my mother to get a Brazillian wax. If that's not bad enough, my mother heard and yelled from the other room, "I like my furball." FML

#9041294 (179)

I agree, your life sucks (24037) - you deserved it (1518)

On 03/13/2010 at 5:35am - intimacy - by Grossed Out - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I woke up in pajamas I have never seen before. Usually, I sleep naked, and I live alone in a locked apartment. Then, the elderly woman next door asked for her nightgown back. Apparently, I sleep-walked and knocked on all the doors in my hallway repeatedly. I'm moving. FML

#9037500 (135)

I agree, your life sucks (18195) - you deserved it (2401)

On 03/13/2010 at 12:27am - misc - by nerdygirl101 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was at my boyfriend's apartment, when I came across a lacy black thong in the laundry. When confronted, he swore it was his. I don't know what's worse, the possibility that another woman left it there, or the idea that my boyfriend owns and wears women's lingerie. FML

#9037172 (171)

I agree, your life sucks (18847) - you deserved it (1694)

On 03/13/2010 at 12:14am - love - by botharebad (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up crying in the middle of a nightmare in which my boyfriend of 8 months shot me through the heart whilst laughing as I screamed 'I Love You'. After I told him about this, he took me into his arms as I cried, stroked my back and said, 'What kind of gun was it?' FML

#9019177 (291)

I agree, your life sucks (21169) - you deserved it (4688)

On 03/12/2010 at 8:17am - love - by justlittleoldme (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. He suddenly pulls away, and goes, 'OMNOMNOMNOM' then continues kissing me. FML

#8938821 (196)

I agree, your life sucks (15364) - you deserved it (14942)

On 03/09/2010 at 1:43am - love - by anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend of over a year told me that we need a code word for when I'm being annoying. FML

#8828114 (96)

I agree, your life sucks (11474) - you deserved it (5579)

On 03/04/2010 at 7:00pm - love - by ugh - United States

Today, I stole a bite of my boyfriend's hamburger. He threw a fit, saying I took too big a bite and I had to replace it with a new, more expensive one. Afterwards, he said how lucky I was he didn't break up with me then and there. FML

#8822462 (391)

I agree, your life sucks (24147) - you deserved it (6342)

On 03/04/2010 at 12:15pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Estonia (Harjumaa)

Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML

#8751188 (453)

I agree, your life sucks (33671) - you deserved it (6914)

On 03/01/2010 at 5:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was waiting downstairs at my boyfriend's house as he got ready to go. His mom came over and said she was so glad her son had met me, that I made him really happy. I smiled thinking how nice that was of her to say. She then continued, "Still, he tells me anal is a no?" FML

#8515469 (165)

I agree, your life sucks (16246) - you deserved it (1970)

On 02/21/2010 at 12:16pm - intimacy - by charliesangel123 (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I was at work and talking to my boss. Out of habit, I tried to adjust my bra strap and pull it up. My hand slipped off the strap and I punched myself in the face resulting in a fat lip. My boss snorted. He told everyone. FML

#8389533 (93)

I agree, your life sucks (11248) - you deserved it (6430)

On 02/17/2010 at 10:18pm - work - by E (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, as I was about to leave my house in my brand new heels, I stepped on a dead mouse. My heel went through it. FML

#8370926 (165)

I agree, your life sucks (20581) - you deserved it (3441)

On 02/17/2010 at 10:05am - misc - by juwkgo (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was having a very realistic dream about a hot guy. Just as he was leaning in to ravish me, I was rudely awakened by the sound of my husband farting and snorting at the same time. FML

#8005552 (201)

I agree, your life sucks (19825) - you deserved it (7719)

On 02/08/2010 at 6:24am - love - by dreamteam (woman) - United States