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catfacetheogre

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catfacetheogre

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catfacetheogre's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife changed her name back to her maiden name. Why? So people would stop asking questions about us. We have been married for 15 years. FML

#7411056
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27444) - you deserved it (2332)

On 01/18/2010 at 12:06am - love - by unloved (man) - United Kingdom (Southend-on-Sea)

Today, I went to meet my boyfriend's parents for the first time. His mother, seconds upon meeting me, gave me a hug, smiled at me, and said: "It's so nice to finally meet you! All I ever hear is 'Emma this', and 'Emma that', 'I love Emma!'. He never stops talking about you!" My name's not Emma. FML

#7306926
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41269) - you deserved it (2208)

On 01/12/2010 at 8:39pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I told my boyfriend that I loved his flaming red hair. He told me that he loved the fuzz on my butt. FML

#7231026
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25689) - you deserved it (6750)

On 01/09/2010 at 3:16am - misc - by Snowin2007 (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. As I was leaving his house I hear him shout "Hey! Wait! Sweetie, come back here!". He was talking to his cat who ran out the door behind me. FML

#4733759
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32786) - you deserved it (2877)

On 08/22/2009 at 11:39am - love - by roostergirl (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was holding my baby daughter during a checkup. To reassure her, I was kissing the back of her head while the Dr. was checking her hearing. After a few minutes, I realized the Dr. had put his hand to steady her head. I was kissing his hand. FML

#4210609
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36669) - you deserved it (20927)

On 08/01/2009 at 5:37pm - misc - by smoochie -

Today, I found out that my brother was selling pictures of me showering. For what? World of Warcraft money. FML

#4073449
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65780) - you deserved it (4300)

On 07/27/2009 at 3:32am - misc - by Anon (woman) - Singapore

Today, I got my wisdom teeth out. My doctor said it was okay to eat, so, I had some mashed potatoes. Apparently, my body disagreed with the doctor, because I threw up. Because my face was so swollen, it didn't make it out my mouth. It went through my nose instead. I literally blew chunks. FML

Today, I was working at a local restaurant when another server's table called me over to ask if I've "ever killed anybody". They informed me I looked like a serial killer. I informed them, of course, that I have never killed anybody. Another customer claimed I scared her child. I was fired. FML

#964026
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67970) - you deserved it (4145)

On 04/14/2009 at 2:13am - work - by Bob (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was having lunch with my sister and my mother. While my mom was busy ordering food, my sister said to me, "look at this face I can make!" and she grossly contorted her face so that she had a double chin. My mother looked over and said to her, "stop making fun of your sister!" FML

#554363
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67065) - you deserved it (4741)

On 03/23/2009 at 3:22pm - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I remember the first night I spent with my first English boyfriend. I'm French, and when we woke up, I said in my most sexy voice "Oh, I'm so dirty!" It's only when he left that I finally understood the look on his face; I wanted to have a glass of water. I was thirsty, not dirty. FML

#286
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28731) - you deserved it (6993)

On 11/12/2008 at 3:10am - intimacy - by aur - Sent from mobile version



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