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carleybeak

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carleybeak
  • Town/Country : Mitten state, 'Murcia
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 541
  • Number of comments : 19
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 32 posted

About carleybeak : Swimming, water polo, skiing, pokémon, minecraft and nutella.
I love talking to new people so don't be afraid to send me a message :3
Follow me on instagram :D @chlorinecobra

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carleybeak's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of carleybeak's badges

carleybeak's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to endure yet another evening of the old man in the apartment above me screaming, "No, I don't want to shave my nose hair, you crazy bitch." He lives alone. FML

#18178318
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22396) - you deserved it (1381)

On 11/06/2011 at 8:23pm - misc - by hurtsmyears (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, at work, my mouse cursor kept randomly moving all over the screen, and messed up an entire day's attempted work. As I was leaving, I overheard one of my co-workers saying he'd plugged a wireless mouse adapter into my computer, and had been trolling me all day. FML

#18156228
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27768) - you deserved it (2870)

On 11/04/2011 at 12:05pm - work - by tech_support (man) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today, the boy I like came to my house with a dozen roses to ask me to homecoming. My uncle chased him down the street with a pitchfork. FML

#17857162
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31252) - you deserved it (1671)

On 09/28/2011 at 5:52pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while taking a stroll in the park, a kid walked up to me and asked, "Do you believe in unicorns?" I answered, "No." He dunked his ice cream cone on my head, laughed hysterically, and ran off screaming, "BELIEVE!" FML

#17737717
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23454) - you deserved it (10127)

On 09/13/2011 at 5:21pm - misc - by unicorn - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had a creepy old guy with awful body odor in my salon. As I was washing his hair, he brought up how he wants to start a garden, and how a woman's monthly flow weirdly helps to make it grow. Then he asked me if I can save up my used tampons for him. FML

#17724529
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30117) - you deserved it (1486)

On 09/11/2011 at 11:23pm - work - by fashionista1787 - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, the girl I've been dating, and starting to fall in love with, walked out of the bathroom claiming we were going to be parents. I jumped off of the couch in disbelief, yelling, "Really?" She replied, "Really. I just gave birth to a huge dump baby." FML

#17718767
348 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33929) - you deserved it (6436)

On 09/11/2011 at 11:13am - misc - by CaseyFpC85 - United States (Florida)

Today, a five year old that I am babysitting picked up a knife and said he would chop my nuts off if I didn't give him his ice cream before dinner. Only 5 more hours to go. FML

#17672212
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23378) - you deserved it (2121)

On 09/05/2011 at 4:23pm - kids - by thatoneguy - United States (Texas)

Today, my grandmother pulled down her pants and screamed, "Kiss my ass" in the middle of a packed restaurant. FML

#17669006
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24885) - you deserved it (2405)

On 09/05/2011 at 9:00am - misc - by Brie - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went to a restaurant with a girl I really liked. She started crying when an overweight family walked in and loudly sobbed about how the parents were "murdering" their children. This made the father of that family try to fight me. FML

#17649932
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25181) - you deserved it (2397)

On 09/03/2011 at 1:33am - health - by whatdidIdo (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I was in my car with my window down at a red light. Outside, a sweet old lady was sitting on a bench with her dog sleeping next to her. I yelled out the window to tell her how cute her dog was. She replied, "He's dead" and cried. FML

#17639709
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25822) - you deserved it (3682)

On 09/01/2011 at 10:29pm - animals - by macattack (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I asked my Dad if it was true that my mother had a C-section at my birth. He replied "Yeah, so technically you weren't even born, you were surgically removed, like a tumor." FML

#17638273
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29374) - you deserved it (3955)

On 09/01/2011 at 7:40pm - misc - by mannydanny (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, I started my first day working at a toddler day care center. At one point I decided to play "got your nose" with one of the kids. It turns out this kid has a physical birth abnormality on his face. I got his nose... his prosthetic nose. FML

#17629318
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34142) - you deserved it (8525)

On 08/31/2011 at 12:04pm - kids - by MJjunior (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, while playing with bubble wrap, I dislocated my thumb. FML

#17628790
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17484) - you deserved it (9831)

On 08/31/2011 at 10:02am - health - by Bigpoppa0507 - Canada

Today, while at the grocery store an elderly woman farted very loudly next to me. Everyone in the aisle looked our way. The woman pointed at me, and left the aisle. I received many disgusted looks from children and their parents. FML

#17555349
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24160) - you deserved it (1786)

On 08/23/2011 at 3:14am - misc - by kykynevs - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was at Target deciding what chap-stick to get when an old lady violently hit me with her umbrella and kept yelling at me saying, "You are too young for this! Think twice!" FML

#17525385
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22159) - you deserved it (1733)

On 08/20/2011 at 12:44am - misc - by anonymous22kittylicklick (woman) - United States (New York)



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