Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

carecow

Offline (yesterday at 10:52pm) | Search for a member

carecow

112Fucked!

carecow
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 25 July 1993 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1071
  • Number of comments : 77
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About carecow : Smoke and lasers, love and ravers.
Afterglow, we're ready for the afterglow.

In my spare time I try to teach fish about poetry.

I may or may not own a Pikachu onesie. Tail included.

carecow's page activity

Visits<b>toasty_narwals</b> - yesterday at 2:23pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - yesterday at 10:44pm<b>IndicaPaincakes</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 9:53pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 4:45am<b>Teeleebabyy</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 1:36am<b>llamaaduckk</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 12:14am<b>ProximityToDeath</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 11:39pm<b>dewberry2001</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 9:12am<b>countrywomen</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 11:48pm<b>Jessica0928</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 8:40pm<b>leeleeamber</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 2:08am<b>delilablue95</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 1:19am<b>suzannemarszalek</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 9:03pm<b>jessvrae</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 6:22am<b>chandler88</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 10:38pm<b>celister1994</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 5:41pm<b>Lct1196</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 10:10am<b>needs2Bsaid</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 11:06pm

Fucked!<b>delilablue95</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 5:34pm<b>jessvrae</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 12:22pm<b>dieana</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 4:59am<b>lolo717</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 5:19pm<b>queensassygoat</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 6:42am<b>morganshea</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 11:32pm<b>llamaaduckk</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 12:17pm<b>oldmanringo</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 5:33pm<b>saylorpayne</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 4:53pm<b>RealSuperSand</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 12:58am<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 10:47pm<b>nityasomaiya</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 4:55am<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 2:09am<b>FiFiLovee</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 7:58pm<b>Stxsyh</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 8:02am<b>summergirl69</b> - the 05/26/2015 at 10:17pm<b>hotcheetoss</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 10:04pm<b>Stillo</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 8:47am

carecow's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

See all of carecow's badges

carecow's favorite FMLs

Today, for my Christmas bonus at work, I got a potted plant and some lotion. FML

#21322774
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27740) - you deserved it (2844)

On 12/23/2014 at 3:58pm - work - by whut - United States

Today, my teacher was talking about anorexia and bulimia. Midway through the lesson, she stopped and knowingly asked if I wanted to share my experiences with the class. I don't have an eating disorder, just a screwed-up metabolism. FML

#20904715
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51177) - you deserved it (3013)

On 10/02/2013 at 2:37pm - health - by 94lbs of muscle -

Today, I was playing World of Warcraft, when all of a sudden, I remembered I was supposed to be at a wedding. I was 25 minutes late to my own wedding. FML

#20880446
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22333) - you deserved it (89942)

On 09/14/2013 at 1:23am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML

#20163281
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49598) - you deserved it (6264)

On 11/14/2012 at 4:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was fooling around a bit with my girlfriend while cooking dinner when she said, "Don't get too excited, I want to watch The Princess and the Frog tonight." I just got cockblocked by a Disney movie. FML

#13817966
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35631) - you deserved it (6895)

On 11/12/2010 at 6:48pm - intimacy - by roberto (man) - Brazil (Sao Paulo)

Today, my pet hedgehog thought it would be funny to roll around in the kitty litter. It was like washing a poopy cactus. FML



FML's blog

  • Feeling shitty? Write to Auntie Bernie!
  • It's a new summer, so here's a new feature. OK, that doesn't mean much, but you've got to start somewhere. The idea came from the fact that we get sent a lot of FMLs that touch us, in our heart of…

Friday 24 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: