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caplox

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caplox

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 570
  • Number of comments : 118
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About caplox : whaaaaat

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caplox's favorite FMLs

Today, wanting to impress my date, I bullshitted her about how I was an environmental scientist. She got so impressed that she invited me over to her place. Not her home, her office. So that I could give her pointers on her current project. She's a real environmental scientist. FML

#20531914
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8834) - you deserved it (67895)

On 03/05/2013 at 3:48am - work - by is there a environmental scientist in the house? - United States (California)

Today, my wife finally came home from deployment. Apparently, in the military she really built up some muscle. When she saw me at the airport, she picked me up like a baby and spun me around in her arms a few times. I'm a little scared of her now. FML

#20530533
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38927) - you deserved it (9413)

On 03/04/2013 at 2:36am - love - by married to wonder woman (man) - United States (California)

Today, my wife finally came home from deployment. Apparently, in the military she really built up some muscle. When she saw me at the airport, she picked me up like a baby and spun me around in her arms a few times. I'm a little scared of her now. FML

#20530533
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38927) - you deserved it (9413)

On 03/04/2013 at 2:36am - love - by married to wonder woman (man) - United States (California)

Today, I gave birth to my daughter in a hospital corridor. The nurse who took me to my room afterward tried to comfort me by saying there've been worse incidents; she said that two years ago, a lady gave birth in the parking lot. That was me too. FML

#20521872
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55113) - you deserved it (4426) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/25/2013 at 2:47pm - health - by laprochainefoisjerestealamaison (woman) - France (Languedoc-Roussillon)

Today, I met my new class. There are two Kevin Smiths. Neither will agree to a nickname, they have the same hair color, and their middle names both start with J. They have told me to call them Kevin 1 and Kevin 2. They both want to be Kevin 1. FML

#20512577
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37636) - you deserved it (2995)

On 02/18/2013 at 7:26pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at an open mic comedy club, my jokes went down so poorly that someone decided to hurl a chair at me on-stage. FML

#20466782
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26479) - you deserved it (14115)

On 01/18/2013 at 7:26pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Iceland

Today, my boyfriend showed up at my grandmother's wake in torn jeans and a Family Guy t-shirt. When I took him aside asked him what the hell he was thinking, he lost his temper and stormed out. FML

#20442809
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19773) - you deserved it (3725)

On 01/04/2013 at 5:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had awful morning sickness, and I asked my husband if he'd get me a drink while I went to the bathroom. On the way back, I witnessed him spitting in the glass. FML

#20165918
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31125) - you deserved it (2450)

On 11/16/2012 at 9:00pm - love - by akiza (woman) - Japan

Today, I went to see a movie with three of my friends, and I was sharing popcorn with one of them. Halfway through the movie, my friend asked me why I wasn't eating our popcorn. I then realised I'd been taking popcorn from the man sitting next to me. FML

#20160393
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25277) - you deserved it (7550)

On 11/12/2012 at 12:27pm - misc - by mm (woman) - United Kingdom (Warrington)

Today, my teacher wore a bikini at the pool. She is 68. FML

#20153506
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21792) - you deserved it (3904)

On 11/07/2012 at 1:39pm - work - by Owen - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was waitressing for a huge family. Their bill was $750. Excited about the tip, I was shocked to see only $0.50. As they were leaving, I threw the two whole quarters at their heads. Guess who also got fired today. FML

#20150831
484 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17940) - you deserved it (42113)

On 11/06/2012 at 5:37pm - work - by Misunderstood Waitress (woman) - United States

Today, in the middle of a hot air balloon ride with my girlfriend, I asked her to marry me. She said no. The rest of the ride was the most awkward 2 hours of my life. FML

#20148134
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32140) - you deserved it (3853)

On 11/04/2012 at 10:26pm - love - by Tj Hunt - United States

Today, I watched my girlfriend slowly floss her teeth, and then eat what showed up on the floss. FML

#20147554
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23583) - you deserved it (2792)

On 11/04/2012 at 4:16pm - misc - by i fking love docb - Virgin Islands, U.S.

Today, I found out that not only is my girlfriend enough of a superstitious twat to believe the world is going to end on December 21st, she actually thinks it's an acceptable excuse to go sleep around with other men. FML

#20146254
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28424) - you deserved it (2939)

On 11/03/2012 at 8:37pm - love - by markderanjer (man) - United Kingdom (Ealing)

Today, I fell asleep on the bus. When I woke up, my head was resting on the broad, tanned shoulder of the smoking hot guy sitting next to me. I had drooled a little. FML

#19780908
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23241) - you deserved it (4332)

On 06/13/2012 at 5:08am - misc - by pandora (woman) - Israel (HaMerkaz)



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