About cannibalcorpseXD : I'm a normal boy.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
100 kick ass comments
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Today, I went shopping for a new pair of jeans. I was feeling good about the fact that I was going down a waist size until the cashier decided to discuss with me, three co-workers, and the ten other people in line how she didn't even know jeans came in sizes that big. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29691) - you deserved it (5533)
On 10/06/2009 at 9:11pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was walking out of class when I saw a girl enthusiastically run to her boyfriend, jump on him, and smother him with kisses. I thought to myself "I wish my girlfriend did that." When the girl jumped off and turned around I realized she did, just not to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46070) - you deserved it (2128)
On 10/06/2009 at 8:04pm - misc - by zitroskies (man) - United States (California)
Today, I poured my heart out into what had to be my greatest set of lyrics for my band ever, at the same time my teacher was explaining chemical changes to the class. At the end of the lecture he picked up my paper, and set it on fire to demonstrate a chemical change. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28611) - you deserved it (23941)
On 10/06/2009 at 6:23pm - misc - by 3LLI0TT (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, while cleaning up, I dropped a box of thumbtacks, spilling them all over the floor. As I fumbled to pick them up, the power went out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38369) - you deserved it (2900)
On 10/01/2009 at 6:31pm - misc - by Ouchies (woman) - United States (Florida) - moderated by Kevin Nealon
Today, I found out that if you don't clean the inside of your sonicare toothbrush, it can grow masses of fungus. I've been brushing my teeth with a vibrating mushroom for the past 5 months. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22446) - you deserved it (15028)
On 10/01/2009 at 5:57pm - misc - by mushroommouth (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I woke up to the realization that the 2-hour nap I wanted to take before I went out with my friends last night was actually a 12-hour nap. I missed everything. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9660) - you deserved it (21843)
On 10/01/2009 at 3:05am - misc - by Ataraxia (man) - United States (California) - moderated by Kevin Nealon
Today, after an amazing sex session, my boyfriend rolls over and stares lovingly into my eyes, puts his hand on my cheek caressing it tenderly... and says "Who's a good piggy?" in his best Homer Simpson's voice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17073) - you deserved it (3237)
On 09/30/2009 at 4:28am - intimacy - by homersgirl (woman) - United States (Mississippi)
Today, I learned to check inside the oven before you preheat it. Sometimes children hide their pet rabbit in there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (58452) - you deserved it (8019)
On 09/28/2009 at 3:15am - misc - by ripfluffy (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I was cuddling on the couch with my girlfriend when I started to tickle her, she asked me to stop but I continued. She had a reaction, and kneed me in the happy sacks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5639) - you deserved it (44554)
On 09/26/2009 at 10:19pm - love - by civicman (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I played with a boomerang my first time. I didn't believe that when you threw it, it comes right back to you. It flew back all right. And broke my nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8320) - you deserved it (30381)
On 09/24/2009 at 5:39pm - misc - by BOOMerang (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I had to hand write a 10 page essay for one of my classes. When I turned it in I got an automatic zero. It was written in blue. Not black. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35883) - you deserved it (8083)
On 09/23/2009 at 9:18pm - misc - by stupid (woman) - United States
Today, my husband blew all the candles on his birthday cake while I was taking a photo in front of him. I will probably never use cocoa powder to decorate a birthday cake anymore. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6691) - you deserved it (25753)
On 09/23/2009 at 8:08am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (South Australia)
Today, I was at my friends house for the first time in months. I saw her newest chihuahua dog, Mickey, and he was excited that new people were over. I picked him up and slightly bounced him in the air. Because of the bounce and his excitement, he peed a little bit, straight into my eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12210) - you deserved it (21732)
On 09/23/2009 at 1:55am - animals - by GreatAim - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was in my 15-year-old sister’s room when I found birth control pills. I told my parents, who responded by saying, "Sex is beautiful thing." When I was her age my parents caught me pleasuring myself, and smashed my laptop with a hammer, all while calling me "filthy" and "immoral". FML
I agree, your life sucks (45507) - you deserved it (6918)
On 09/20/2009 at 4:55pm - misc - by LovesHisHand (man) - United States (California)
Today, I asked my dad to pick me up from school, he said he couldn't. Why? he was busy playing world of warcraft for the night. I got to walk the 3 hours home while my 49 year old dad played computer games. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36840) - you deserved it (3190)
On 09/14/2009 at 10:56pm - misc - by stupid (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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