About cannibalcorpseXD : I'm a normal boy.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
100 kick ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
Today, I realised I hate my cat. She has 'stress incontinence', which involved her peeing all over my house. Last week I found out she'd been peeing on my stove, and I can't clean off the smell. Now whenever I try to cook some food, the kitchen is flooded with the scent of burning cat pee. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22363) - you deserved it (3812)
On 11/12/2009 at 12:30pm - animals - by NotEnoughCleaner (woman) - United Kingdom (Merseyside)
Today, I realized that I hadn't shaved in so long that when the wind blew, the hairs on my legs moved in the breeze. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5536) - you deserved it (34175)
On 11/12/2009 at 6:17am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my friends created a fake Facebook profile of a girl, and asked me to be in a relationship. Even my friends think I can't get a real girlfriend, and need a fake one to feel better. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21759) - you deserved it (3053)
On 11/02/2009 at 7:41am - misc - by chocolaterabbit - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was driving my child to school when the car let out a huge bang. It shuddered to a halt. My son started laughing. I asked him what was funny but he wouldn't tell me. The car wouldn't start. I called RACV and they told me the problem. My son had rolled 9 golf balls into the exhaust pipe. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25724) - you deserved it (2619)
On 11/01/2009 at 1:44am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I work as a cashier, and Iike always I asked the customer paying credit to sign the "sheet" of paper. I recieved a dirty look from one woman who apparently talked to the manager about me, saying I had asked her to sign the "shitty" paper. I have now been warned for "derogatory language." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20798) - you deserved it (1759)
On 10/29/2009 at 4:38pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I took my car through the car wash. I got bored, so turned the radio on, forgetting that the aerial/antenna on the car is automatic. My car aerial is now bent at a 90 degree angle and about to fall off. The radio is half white noise, half stuff that may or may not be free jazz jam sessions. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4942) - you deserved it (22102)
On 10/28/2009 at 6:14am - misc - by ohsnap (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I cut my finger open with a spoon. After waiting for 4 hours in the emergency room, the doctor told me I was missing too much flesh to qualify for stitches. He then called 2 other doctors in to examine it. Apparently they had a contest for patient with most ridiculous injury. I won. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26991) - you deserved it (5572)
On 10/28/2009 at 4:03am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I found out you can get arrested if your landlord quits paying the garbage bill and doesn't tell you. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25977) - you deserved it (1201)
On 10/27/2009 at 2:46am - misc - by TrashHound (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was cooking. I leaned over the stove to preheat the oven, and burned my nipple on a pot of boiling water. I also have a teething son who is breastfeeding. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31361) - you deserved it (7781)
On 10/25/2009 at 2:42pm - misc - by roadbikemama (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was texting my boyfriend. I noticed that he had added a signature onto his texts that had the date 11/10/09. At first, I blushed and thought it was the date we had become a couple. But then I realized it was just the day the new Call of Duty game comes out. Love you too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13486) - you deserved it (23020)
On 10/20/2009 at 1:26am - love - by gamergirlfriend (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I handed out 30 resumes only to find out, after the last resume was handed out, my brother had changed the last sentence of every paragraph to 'I am a massive douche bag.' FML
I agree, your life sucks (29529) - you deserved it (5233)
On 10/18/2009 at 6:52am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (75033) - you deserved it (10605)
On 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I won an award at school for my hard work. Afterwards, my parents told me off. Why? They wanted my brother to get it instead of me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27037) - you deserved it (1056)
On 10/14/2009 at 4:21am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, at work, my stomach hurt and I passed gas for relief. Moments later, I discovered that my loose, silent "fart" was actually a wet, sneaky shart. The mess was beyond repair; I had to fake a family emergency and crept out of the office so that my coworkers wouldn't see my obvious crap stain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25833) - you deserved it (6309)
On 10/12/2009 at 2:10pm - health - by Few_Absolutes (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I discovered that the school I transferred from last year is closing. All the people that I so happily escaped from and left behind at that school will now be flocking to my new school senior year. Faaaantastic. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30783) - you deserved it (2759)
On 10/08/2009 at 10:30pm - misc - by Augh. (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Friday 24 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
