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cannibalcorpseXD

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cannibalcorpseXD
  • Town/Country : Tallahassee, America
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 3 January 1983 (31 years)
  • Number of visits : 5854
  • Number of comments : 275
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 128 posted

About cannibalcorpseXD : I'm a normal boy.

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cannibalcorpseXD's favorite FMLs

Today, I got mauled by a cat named Mr. Sprinkles. FML

#7989901
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22872) - you deserved it (4995)

On 02/07/2010 at 10:19pm - animals - by zzdug (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my mother and I were driving through Del Taco. Instead of ordering "Macho Diet Coke", she said "Macho Diet Cock". After correcting herself and pulling up to the window, the employee who goes to my high school gave her the drink and his phone number. FML

#7898835
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18335) - you deserved it (1687)

On 02/05/2010 at 2:52am - misc - by MachoFluster (man) - United States (California)

Today, after a 9 hour train journey through the Polish mountains, I mistook a small black and white cat for a penguin. FML

#7753141
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5290) - you deserved it (21007)

On 01/31/2010 at 7:21pm - animals - by saintmichi (woman) - Poland (Malopolskie)

Today, I was watching a horror movie with my girlfriend. Suddenly, the killer jumped on screen. My girlfriend screamed. I peed myself. FML

#7736774
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30865) - you deserved it (11994)

On 01/31/2010 at 5:16am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I discovered that my best friend of 3 years has me in her phone as "Stupid Bitch". FML

#7718053
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23313) - you deserved it (3413)

On 01/30/2010 at 7:32pm - misc - by hahahawoww (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was rushed to the hospital because I was crying so hard I couldn't breathe. Why was I crying? My favorite anime character died. FML

#7711889
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14576) - you deserved it (72044)

On 01/30/2010 at 3:54pm - misc - by Obsessed (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my heating broke. It's 22 degrees outside, and my father won't let us call someone to fix it because apparently the cold helps the soul grow. FML

#7708353
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22845) - you deserved it (1899)

On 01/30/2010 at 1:45pm - misc - by vikhelios - Sent from mobile version

Today, my dad came out of a hotel bathroom with nothing but a wash-cloth over his crotch and said "look! this place has cotton loin clothes" in front of my wedding party. FML

#7706171
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25084) - you deserved it (1913)

On 01/30/2010 at 12:21pm - misc - by indianaxx - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was potty training my nephew. He had been on the toilet for almost twenty minutes and could not go. My phone started ringing, and as I went to pick it up he knocked it into the toilet. He then peed and pooped on it. FML

#7642082
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25995) - you deserved it (3141)

On 01/28/2010 at 12:55pm - kids - by jmitch1209 (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I asked my boyfriend advice on apartment hunting - as we were planning to move in with each other. He told me that there is no way he can afford to move out of his parents' house anytime soon. He can, however, afford a collection of belt-fed automatic nerf guns. FML

Today, I went to the doctor for horrible stomach pains. He said I had an abnormal amount of stool in me, and that I'd need to flush it out. I called my mom and told her what happened, to which she responded, "I always knew you were full of shit, I didn't need a doctor to tell me that." FML

#7631341
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29535) - you deserved it (6109)

On 01/28/2010 at 12:01am - misc - by Crap (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boss screamed at me for almost an hour because, apparently, I hurt my coworker's feelings when I stopped speaking to her after finding out that she was sleeping with my boyfriend. FML

Today, my mum got drunk at a party and flashed me and my friends. FML

#7608108
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33430) - you deserved it (2830)

On 01/27/2010 at 5:20am - misc - by Sundendako (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found out my girlfriend and her best friend compare the dumps they take to common transportation. They comment about it on each others facebook page. My girlfriend's last one was apparently a 'coach bus'. FML

#7600232
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15528) - you deserved it (2461)

On 01/26/2010 at 10:14pm - health - by poops - United States

Today, some girl from Colorado called me. She knew my name. My Facebook. I had no idea how she got my number. She then asks me out. I say "sure" sarcastically. She then calls my girlfriend, who also lives in Colorado. Our relationship is now over. FML

#7598388
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9785) - you deserved it (30838)

On 01/26/2010 at 9:12pm - love - by Aaron (man) - United States (Maryland)



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