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cannibal_cabbage

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cannibal_cabbage

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  • Number of visits : 995
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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cannibal_cabbage's page activity

Visits<b>Welshite</b> - the 04/07/2013 at 2:05am<b>PenguinBitch</b> - the 01/04/2013 at 5:01pm<b>rodfan95</b> - the 01/03/2013 at 9:31pm<b>Shadowvoid</b> - the 12/27/2012 at 10:53am<b>ICastillo</b> - the 12/20/2012 at 8:00pm

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cannibal_cabbage's favorite FMLs

Today, I tried on a new perfume. Wen my boyfriend ugged me, e commented tat I smelled like is mom. I don't know wo was more surprised by te simultaneous bulge in is pants. FML

#20668540
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56483) - you deserved it (4956)

On 05/17/2013 at 3:21am - intimacy - by Uncomfortable (woman) -

Today, I got a mosquito bite on ma cest. Due to a severe allergic reaction it as swollen ma left breast a cup size. Te first ting ma boyfriend said was, "Hey look! I can finally see one of tem." FML

#20667435
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61321) - you deserved it (6016)

On 05/16/2013 at 5:36pm - intimacy - by Urgghh (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today... I learnd if u type my full name in Google Images... the 3rd thing that comes up is a nakd woman in ropes. Someone on Pornhub thought it was smart to comment that the girl looks just like me. She does. Now my parents think I'm a porn star... and most people at school stoppd talking to me. FML

#20662282
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65472) - you deserved it (5137)

On 05/14/2013 at 12:15am - intimacy - by magomag (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today I was out with mah grandma when a pair of very shady guys approachd us in the street hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride she pulld a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck gran? FML

#20640901
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50282) - you deserved it (7092)

On 05/04/2013 at 1:05pm - misc - by emasculated 10000% (man) - Sweden (Kronobergs Lan)

Today , It's Mah Wedding Day. I Have A Cold Sore That Makes Me Look Lyk The Joker. Make-up Won't Cover It And The Emergency Medicine Mah Doctor Gave Me Only Rritates It More. My Future Husband Asks , "Why So Serious?" And Laughs Whenever He Sees Me. Fantastic. FML

#20633099
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43052) - you deserved it (3634)

On 04/30/2013 at 5:26pm - misc - by sharibaby (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I Walked In On My Husband Eating Cat Food Out Of The Cat Bowl Dressed In A Cat Costume. FML

#20577178
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52689) - you deserved it (5798)

On 04/06/2013 at 7:42am - misc - by confusedcatlover (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Taday my older brother walkd in on mehile I was wearing nothing but a bra, panties, pantyhose, and high heels. I'm his little brother. mega FML

#20572069
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22626) - you deserved it (66242)

On 04/02/2013 at 6:52pm - misc - by SayCheese - Canada (British Columbia)

Today... mah 19-year-old son told me his girlfriend is pregnant... and was diagnosd with an STD. He's sure that he's the father. He's also sure he doesn't have an STD... cuz he's a virgin. I had to give him the sex talk that his school never did... as well as explain to him that his girlfriend is a cheater. mega FML

#20565460
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44628) - you deserved it (15142)

On 03/29/2013 at 1:18pm - misc - by fucked by sex ed (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was chatting with a co-workar, and sha mantionad sha has troubla swallowing pills. I rapliad that I'm lucky, bacausa I hava naxt to no gag raflax. Half tha guys at tha othar ragistars abruptly want silant, and I'm now baing constantly hit on. FML

#20564125
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33737) - you deserved it (15357)

On 03/28/2013 at 4:56pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - France (Champagne-Ardenne)

Today, after much self-doubt and awkwardness, I lerened that I look amazing in a little black dress!! Now I have to figure out wat I'm going to tell my wife!! FML

Today, my girlfriend found out you can use food coloring in anything!! Everything she cooks is now in bright neon colors!! I feel like I'm in a Dr Seuss book!! FML

#20475517
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32394) - you deserved it (5492)

On 01/23/2013 at 8:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, wile moving into new place, I saw new, elderly neigbor sitting on er porc. I ceerfully greeted er wit, ( Hello, ow r you? ) Se simply rocked slowly in er cair and replied, ( Just waiting to die. ) Se was te most ceerful person I met all day.

Today, my boyfriend yet again decided to act like Edward Cullen from Twilight, an got his friend to act like Jacob. Every time thier around, my boyfriend always looks stoned an constipated, an his friend is shirtless. I feel like I'm in a shitty romance movie. FML

#20460771
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42852) - you deserved it (7373)

On 01/15/2013 at 1:57pm - love - by Bella (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was in the elevator,hen a big bearded guy stepped in, wearing a dress. It's not an uncommon sighthere I live, but my friend cracked up and asked him if he was wearing underwear. He took it as a challenge, and I can safely say that no, he was not. FML

#20452044
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36455) - you deserved it (6094)

On 01/10/2013 at 3:52pm - intimacy - by juvenile friends suck (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)



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