Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Offline (the 03/15/2015 at 3:19pm) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 7 May 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 777
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 2 posted

About cannedpeas : I like taking pictures of my ass, and cuddling. I don't like chocolate, unless it's in or on something else. I've been told I give good blowjobs. One of my favourite things to do lately is kiss and cuddle with my big teddy bear. We get really fucking passionate.

And holy shit do I suck at replying to messages. Just keeping trying, I'll get to you eventually.

cannedpeas's page activity

Visits<b>Isak366</b> - 12 hours ago<b>MxAxRxCxO</b> - 15 hours ago<b>Kasparkilo05</b> - 20 hours ago<b>ZombiePandaFace</b> - yesterday at 11:41am<b>Soninuva</b> - yesterday at 11:57pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - yesterday at 11:52pm<b>bchin1220</b> - yesterday at 4:33pm<b>jacky75</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 11:03pm<b>my_account_</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 7:19pm<b>IamHercules</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 2:44pm<b>Scryll</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 12:03am<b>ThatKidFromLA</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 10:43pm<b>ClayDude365</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 7:50pm<b>davidxflow</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 2:24am<b>Broadway_Vayne</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 1:38am<b>fridaayy</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 1:53pm<b>steve1122</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 12:17pm<b>stuckintime</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 6:32am

Liked!<b>ThatKidFromLA</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 3:44am<b>Isak366</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 9:24am<b>0mysteriousman0</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 1:36pm<b>xSphinx</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 10:44am<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 10:58pm<b>kooljac702</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 4:21pm<b>cottoncandylips</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 3:02am<b>Blee864</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 1:12am<b>je83185</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 5:21am<b>hugeteddybear</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 4:21am<b>ActionFearo</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 1:16am<b>slender_gab</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 8:22pm<b>bdobbs1</b> - the 01/07/2015 at 6:52pm<b>WantdDOA</b> - the 01/07/2015 at 1:41am<b>Mandour2310</b> - the 01/07/2015 at 1:01am<b>itasadlife</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 5:18am<b>arule2012</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 3:38am<b>epicnessrkdjdhw</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 6:17am

cannedpeas's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of cannedpeas's badges

cannedpeas's favorite FMLs

Today, an African-American family came into the restaurant at which I work. They said, "Jackson, party of 5." After I laughed, I realized they were serious. FML


I agree, your life sucks (17255) - you deserved it (29618)

On 02/26/2012 at 10:31am - work - by Miss_Kristen - United States (Missouri)

Today, a girl invited me over to her dorm room at 3 AM. For some reason, I thought it would be a good idea to respond to e-mails just before. She said she was tired and then went to bed. I'm a F*ing idiot. FML


I agree, your life sucks (4824) - you deserved it (40499)

On 01/22/2009 at 3:34pm - love - by Princeton - United States (New Jersey)

Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: