candicurl

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candicurl

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3972
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About candicurl : Lame pun coon at your service!

candicurl's page activity

Visits<b>cheyluvsturtles</b> - the 08/10/2016 at 3:13am<b>TheSmurgler</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 5:02pm<b>TheGamingGamer</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 12:32am<b>whatevs4646</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 6:14pm<b>raven83</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 10:01am<b>jerryj</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 5:01am<b>RobotUnicorn1209</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 12:51pm<b>curticus</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 9:17pm<b>1915destroyer</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 1:50am<b>rojdasoenmez</b> - the 03/17/2014 at 1:58am<b>tigerfish</b> - the 02/11/2014 at 12:34am<b>Leoandam</b> - the 02/04/2014 at 2:11am<b>dooropener</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 2:59pm<b>NandaPanda</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 7:04pm<b>Aleys</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 6:03pm<b>ExpressoGuts</b> - the 09/18/2013 at 8:30pm<b>Metroskydiver</b> - the 06/29/2013 at 1:49pm<b>Capernog</b> - the 05/30/2013 at 11:37pm

candicurl's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of candicurl's badges

candicurl's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a few notes from this girl I like at school for 2 years telling me she feels the same way. My dad knocks on the door and I panic and say "Hold on!". I shoved them under my pillow then told him to come in. He said "Son, it's perfectly normal to masturbate." FML

by Misunderstood / 02/08/2009 at 12:35am / United Kingdom (Leicester) / Love

Today, I decided to send my boyfriend a pic text of me naked. I accidentally sent it to my dad and got a text back saying, "You definitely take after your mom." FML

by ruffrider / 02/05/2009 at 9:09am / United States (South Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, I was taking the elevator down with a group of people. It stopped on the 2nd floor and I said "What asshole can't take the steps from the 2nd floor?" Then a kid in a wheelchair got on. FML

by j0natron / 02/03/2009 at 3:30pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, my little sister and I were reading a book together and out of nowhere, she said "I love you". My heart melted and I told her that I love her too. Then she told me that she was talking to her stuffed animal, not me. FML

by Noname / 01/31/2009 at 11:29pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I drunkenly buried my girlfriend's recently deceased cat. Later she asked to see it and came back inside crying. It turns out I didn't bury it completely and its two back legs were poking out of the dirt. FML

by jf29 / 01/30/2009 at 7:49pm / United States (Ohio) / Animals

Today, I was woken up by my roommates cat meowing so loudly at her door, wanting in. Suddenly it stopped. I was just falling back into sleep when I rolled over and the cat was right there beside my head. Meowing. FML

by Noname / 01/30/2009 at 1:18pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, I sneezed so hard I herniated my back. After passing out from the pain I awoke on the floor covered in my own shit and piss. Unable to move, I had to wait in this state for four hours for my wife to return home from work, clean me up and take me to the hospital. FML

by Noname / 01/26/2009 at 7:02pm / Japan (Fukuoka) / Health

Today, I made fun of my friend when she tripped over the curb. I said, loudly, "Haha, you can't even walk." I then notice the man in the wheelchair a few feet ahead of us. FML

by william / 01/22/2009 at 6:22pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I discovered that Paolo has a big penis, that he's good in bed and that the hotel sheets still remember it all. Mum, the walls won't get any thicker just 'cause you're on the telephone. FML

by Anonymous / 01/20/2009 at 12:42am / Miscellaneous

Today, thinking I was being very generous, I lent my jacket to my new co-worker. I guess I should have checked my pockets before I did, I’m not sure that leaving 3 different flavors of condoms in them made a good impression. FML

by Lio / 11/12/2008 at 12:25am / Work