Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

candicemichelle

Search for a member

candicemichelle

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 1 July 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 517
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About candicemichelle : I'm stubborn.
I like to have fun.
I'm simple but sometimes complicated.

candicemichelle's page activity

Visits<b>JoelsLastNight</b> - the 01/16/2014 at 10:08am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:14pm<b>Robotata</b> - the 02/18/2011 at 6:20am<b>omnistryder</b> - the 07/14/2010 at 12:35am<b>Chocolate_Chunk</b> - the 06/09/2010 at 10:34am<b>Beans</b> - the 04/19/2010 at 8:00pm<b>crazysicknasty</b> - the 03/29/2010 at 6:06pm<b>Moshelle</b> - the 03/18/2010 at 3:39am<b>promain212</b> - the 02/24/2010 at 8:35pm<b>tiger888</b> - the 02/24/2010 at 1:23am<b>zainyway</b> - the 02/20/2010 at 8:33pm<b>Xxdom4073xX</b> - the 02/20/2010 at 10:02am<b>kamineko</b> - the 02/20/2010 at 5:27am<b>GeneralElement</b> - the 02/20/2010 at 2:17am<b>jts2</b> - the 02/19/2010 at 1:57pm<b>CallMeHush</b> - the 02/19/2010 at 1:21pm<b>jessxoxo28</b> - the 02/18/2010 at 6:48pm

candicemichelle's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

candicemichelle's favorite FMLs

Today, I was checking out a gorgeous woman in spandex with beautiful flowing long black hair on the treadmill at the gym. I spent a few minutes just watching her body move and ripple under the material. She turned off the treadmill and got off, only for me to find out that it was a guy. FML

#8512491
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10314) - you deserved it (39199)

On 02/21/2010 at 10:16am - love - by anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend proposed. Three hours later, he called me to tell me he was kidding. FML

#8472964
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37095) - you deserved it (2108)

On 02/20/2010 at 8:59am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, in math, I was working on an assignment and this really cute girl comes over and says my name. At this point, my heart is pumping with excitement and I'm thinking she is going to ask for my number. She said, "Did you know someone drew a penis on your back?" FML

#8433331
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25171) - you deserved it (3073)

On 02/19/2010 at 1:32am - misc - by GeneralElement (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend got drunk and cheated on me. After I tried to talk to her about it, she dumped me. Not because she didn't like me anymore or that she liked the other guy, but because she felt "too guilty" and "wouldn't be able to look me in the eyes anymore." FML

#8400274
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25940) - you deserved it (2864)

On 02/18/2010 at 3:58am - love - by Dumped (man) - United States (California)

Today, while serving a rather large party at the restaurant where I work, I mentioned that the soup of the day was "to die for". After the hosts gave me weird looks, it dawned on me that the reason they were wearing all black is because they've just come back from a funeral. FML

#8372297
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22367) - you deserved it (9987)

On 02/17/2010 at 11:32am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, holding my newborn baby and yearning for some affection from my mother, I asked my mom what the best day of her life was, hoping she would say the day I was born. Her answer? "The day you moved out." She was serious. FML

#7467882
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27586) - you deserved it (5866)

On 01/21/2010 at 12:41am - kids - by ilovemom (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I received an early Christmas gift from my boyfriend of ten months. It was soap. In a few days he will be receiving his very expensive specialized car horn he has wanted for years, while I will be enjoying my new bar of Walmart brand soap, which has already begun to give me a rash. FML

#6690600
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30831) - you deserved it (4303)

On 12/10/2009 at 3:04am - love - by soapysoap (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I received my camera in the mail. I had sent it back to the company because it wouldn't turn on. As I was reading the note they put in, it said, "Battery was put in backwards. No other problems found." FML

#6680274
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5351) - you deserved it (40570)

On 12/09/2009 at 1:12pm - misc - by her0x3her0ine617 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went to the doctor's office because my wife and I were having some fertilization problems. As I removed my pants, the doctor simply looked at my penis and said "mhm." My wife laughed the whole way home. FML

#814298
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70909) - you deserved it (4673)

On 04/05/2009 at 9:32am - health - by manlyman (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was in my backyard scolding my cat. I yelled, "If you can't learn to use the bathroom correctly then I am going to leave your stupid butt out here in the snow until you figure it out!!" Later, my neighbor left me a nasty note about child abuse - she thought I was scolding my son. FML

#255521
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46713) - you deserved it (10609)

On 03/09/2009 at 9:16pm - kids - by flaggurl (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I saw a girl texting at school. I told her she might want to put her phone away before she got a detention. She turned around and I saw she was changing her insulin level on her pump. She has diabetes. FML

#112568
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10891) - you deserved it (50910)

On 02/23/2009 at 9:41am - health - by kcd (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I saw a girl texting at school. I told her she might want to put her phone away before she got a detention. She turned around and I saw she was changing her insulin level on her pump. She has diabetes. FML

#112568
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10891) - you deserved it (50910)

On 02/23/2009 at 9:41am - health - by kcd (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
504 comments

I agree, your life sucks (230060) - you deserved it (80595)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)

Today, while at work I was reading "The Very Hungry Caterpillar" to me class of 5 year olds. I got near the end of the book and said "Look at the big fat caterpillar" to which one of my pupils replied "Just like you, Miss!" FML

#55893
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36840) - you deserved it (5261)

On 02/16/2009 at 8:11pm - kids - by Lesley (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #2: In slow-moving hell
  • It was once a dream, now it’s come true. We’re at the place that was allocated months ago for preprogrammed, enforced holiday fun time. We’ve put on some cargo shorts, slipped on some of those…

Wednesday 13 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: