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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, I walked in on my mom's boyfriend jacking off. The worst part was that he didn't stop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30211) - you deserved it (2904)
On 09/01/2010 at 2:16am - intimacy - by Jill Shanks - United States
Today, my fiancé invited his pregnant co-worker for dinner. After we finished eating, he sat down and explained to me that her kid is his and that he's been cheating on me with her for 5 months. She had a smile on her face during the entire thing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (62913) - you deserved it (3132)
On 08/03/2010 at 8:11am - love - by Broken (woman) - United Arab Emirates (Abu Dhabi)
Today, my boyfriend's mother screamed at me for half an hour, calling me a slut because she found a black lacy thong in my boyfriend's bed. I didn't have the heart to tell her it wasn't mine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52981) - you deserved it (6951)
On 07/01/2010 at 9:07pm - intimacy - by slut (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I had a dream I was going the bathroom. I then woke up peeing, but I didn’t wet the bed yet. As I ran to the bathroom while half asleep and in the dark, I rammed into the wall. On my way back to bed, I tripped and accidentally slapped my fiancé in an effort to stop myself from falling over. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19824) - you deserved it (3257)
On 05/27/2010 at 6:50pm - misc - by Fark (woman) - United Kingdom (Cumbria)
Today, I was on my bed on top of my boyfriend when I lost my balance and fell. My father walked in the door to see what the noise was. I don't know what is more embarrassing, my father walking in, or him walking in saying "Thats an expensive bed." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18275) - you deserved it (7327)
On 05/23/2010 at 3:27am - intimacy - by EmbarrassedDaughter (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I met my boyfriend's mom for the first time. She pulls out a freezer bag full of condoms and says "I have some cooler ones upstairs, if you want his penis to glow in the dark." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17233) - you deserved it (2911)
On 03/06/2010 at 7:32pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my girlfriend thought it would be amusing to sneak into my room and jump me in my bed. Too bad that when she jumped, one of her knees landed on my crotch. I haven't been able to walk properly since this morning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17322) - you deserved it (2262)
On 03/03/2010 at 7:36pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my two year old decided to run out the front door alone. I ran after him, tripped over the bottom of my jeans, fell onto the sidewalk and scraped up both my hands and knees. My neighbors just watched. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14321) - you deserved it (2798)
On 03/02/2010 at 1:21pm - kids - by kansasgirl (woman) - United States (Kansas)
Today, I went to the physician to check my rear because it was hurting. My usual doctor wasn't available, so he was replaced by a gorgeous woman with big cleavage. when she asked me to pull down my pants, she saw that I had a huge hard on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9206) - you deserved it (10251)
On 02/28/2010 at 7:33pm - intimacy - by Joel_28 - Canada (Ontario)
Today, while grooming my horse, a spider crawled onto my ear. As if that was bad enough, I'm extremely arachnophobic, so I shrieked out of habit, which in turn caused my horse to freak out and kick me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18784) - you deserved it (4232)
On 01/22/2010 at 8:01pm - animals - by HOLYCOW (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my brother and his friend ambushed me, tied me to a chair, and put a sock in my mouth. My mom found me 10 minutes later, took the sock out, and asked, "Why are you tied to a chair?" I told her what happened. She looked at me, laughed, stuffed the sock back in my mouth, and left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29065) - you deserved it (3468)
On 01/13/2010 at 2:36pm - misc - by boundandgagged (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was singing while lying upside down chewing gum. My dad was trying to focus on the current football game and hushed me. I yelled, "No!" resulting in my gum becoming lodged in my windpipe. I shut up after all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3828) - you deserved it (32981)
On 12/27/2009 at 5:22pm - misc - by LaurenLehmmman (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I discovered that my bed has a flea infestation. I discovered it after sleeping naked in it for about an hour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19024) - you deserved it (4112)
On 12/22/2009 at 1:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I let my boyfriend finger me for the first time. Today, I also learned, after fifteen very, very long minutes of it, how to fake an orgasm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17038) - you deserved it (3805)
On 12/13/2009 at 12:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, while taking a shower, I saw shadows moving across the curtains. The shadow turned out to be a cricket that then fell into the tub. I ran out of the bathroom screaming and naked. My little sister came to my door and said, "If I hadn't just seen your balls, I would swear mom had TWO daughters." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8740) - you deserved it (27607)
On 12/11/2009 at 8:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)
Monday 20 May 2013
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