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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, I asked a waiter at a restaurant if I could go in the kitchen to compliment the chef. She turned out to be really pretty, so trying to be cool, I leaned back onto what I thought was a table. It turned out to be a stove, and my shirt caught fire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8629) - you deserved it (21928)
On 01/08/2012 at 8:51pm - love - by Tiana - United States
Today, I was bored and started touching myself watching TV. My mother walked into my bedroom with a phone in her hand and yelled, "Stop jacking off and talk to your grandmother." FML
I agree, your life sucks (14085) - you deserved it (22274)
On 01/08/2012 at 7:43pm - intimacy - by caught - United States (Washington)
Today, I had to explain to my 25-year-old boyfriend why we cannot get pet raccoons. This is not the first time we have had this conversation. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17873) - you deserved it (710)
On 01/05/2012 at 10:45pm - animals - by britanyann (woman) - United States
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job when she started crying. Despite my pleas for her to stop and attempts to comfort her, she insisted that she continue. I feel like a monster. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35714) - you deserved it (5434)
On 01/02/2012 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, it's New Year's Eve. My husband and I weren't invited to any parties, and we don't have a sitter to be able to go out by ourselves. Instead, I'm watching "Beverly Hills Chihuahua 2" on the Disney channel with our 5-year-old, and my husband has passed out on the couch from sheer boredom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18398) - you deserved it (5110)
On 12/31/2011 at 8:22pm - misc - by Livewire (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I got circumcised by my girlfriend's braces. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43733) - you deserved it (7692)
On 12/31/2011 at 4:21am - intimacy - by nickthetank (man) - Canada (Saskatchewan)
Today, my dad walked into my room, threw some magazines on my bed, and calmly said "You left your porn in the bathroom again." FML
I agree, your life sucks (7888) - you deserved it (32421)
On 12/27/2011 at 12:58pm - intimacy - by ;)loganberry(; - United States (Montana)
Today, I spent the day crying, and ate McDonald's for my Christmas dinner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33415) - you deserved it (3724)
On 12/26/2011 at 1:33am - misc - by Holly Jolly (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying to put his penis in a hole in our bedroom wall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25771) - you deserved it (4288)
On 12/25/2011 at 7:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Southampton)
Today, I learned if you've slept with your soon to be step-brother you should tell your family. If you don't, he may blurt it out while drunk at a family barbecue. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12340) - you deserved it (28147)
On 12/24/2011 at 1:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I was out clubbing, when some bloke at the bar started trying to pick fights with everyone. Trying to defuse the situation with humour, I said, "I used to be a tough guy like you. Then I took an arrow in the knee." The next thing I know, I have a broken nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11507) - you deserved it (26287)
On 12/23/2011 at 9:49pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia
Today, I had my first kiss with the woman I've been in love with for two years. Right as I kissed her, some guys drove by in a car and threw some soggy spaghetti at me, yelling, "Noob!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (25997) - you deserved it (2322)
On 12/23/2011 at 5:53am - love - by johncabbot25 (man) - Canada
Today, my brother and I proposed to our girlfriends at the same time. We had perfect synchronization after practicing for days. My brother's girlfriend said yes, mine said no. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43697) - you deserved it (4360)
On 12/19/2011 at 10:40am - love - by emmmbo - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I talked to my dad about joining the military. He got up, laughed, and said, "As if the army would accept a pussy like you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24257) - you deserved it (4624)
On 12/16/2011 at 12:30am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, while at family dinner, my boyfriend got drunk and told my entire family the things I do in bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26434) - you deserved it (3638)
On 12/15/2011 at 12:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Monday 17 June 2013
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