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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, after getting a pat of appreciation from my girlfriend's father for taking it slow, he found me later, in her room, with my head between her thighs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12495) - you deserved it (29393)
On 02/29/2012 at 5:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I discovered that during fire drills, my school lines everyone up next to some extremely flammable and explosive propane tanks. If we ever have a real fire, we will all die. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22609) - you deserved it (1616)
On 02/25/2012 at 11:18pm - misc - by afraidtoburn (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, in the midst of having sex, my boyfriend decided that, as a joke, he would pretend to be a zombie whilst going down on me. Sadly, the thought turned me so much that I came. This was the first orgasm he's ever given me in over a year of dating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24836) - you deserved it (4546)
On 02/13/2012 at 8:37am - intimacy - by lotrgeek (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I made a Sim of myself and had her work out until she was completely fit, then got her a job and a husband. Meanwhile, I sat at my desk, fat, single and jobless. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11624) - you deserved it (32188)
On 02/06/2012 at 9:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I was having lunch at McDonald's when I dropped a French fry down my shirt. It stuck out the top of my bra. Before I had the chance to remove it, a creepy man picked it out and ate it saying that it was the best French fry he had ever eaten. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36663) - you deserved it (3436)
Today, I flew to England to visit my boyfriend, who has been working there for the past three months. I went to his hotel and waited for him; he never showed up. I called one of his colleagues to ask him what was going on. He had no idea what I was talking about. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27239) - you deserved it (2395)
On 02/01/2012 at 2:31pm - love - by mareda (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, my long lost father came to visit me. He got drunk, then tried to beat me up. My neighbor called the police, and as soon as they got there, my father yelled, "Help! This man tried to stab me!" The sad part is, they believed him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24103) - you deserved it (1187)
On 01/22/2012 at 9:59pm - misc - by Sadfaic (man) - United States
Today, I had to sit through 10 minutes of hearing a man on the tram tell his friend in explicit detail about all the filthy sex acts he'd like to do to me. His friend told him to take a photo to jack off to later. When I tried to tell the tram driver, he told me to "take it as a compliment." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28212) - you deserved it (2800)
On 01/19/2012 at 3:32am - intimacy - by missprude666 (woman) - Australia
Today, I introduced my boyfriend of two weeks to my parents. My dad asked me to leave the room so they could have some "guy talk". I eavesdropped, only to hear the words "sex-crazed f*ck" and a threat to stick bamboo shoots under my boyfriend's fingernails if he ever hurt me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21055) - you deserved it (3203)
On 01/15/2012 at 2:26pm - love - by soontobedumped (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I got my period at school. I didn't notice until a boy asked me if I'd killed someone in my pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35333) - you deserved it (2759)
On 01/14/2012 at 2:47am - health - by shitttyyyday - United States
Today, I had to run a timed mile. I'm terrible at running. During the run, I thought I was doing a good job. That is, until the teacher told me to stop because I was three laps behind everyone else. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19459) - you deserved it (4113)
On 01/11/2012 at 7:51am - health - by Fluffy - United States (Indiana)
Today, I went to my first class of the semester. After an hour of intense note writing, I realized I was in the wrong class. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14904) - you deserved it (18428)
On 01/10/2012 at 12:15pm - work - by student414 (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)
Today, my distraught mom called me, saying my dad had killed himself and to come home right away. After cussing out my math teacher for trying to stop me and rushing back home in a taxi, I ran into the living room, only to find my parents laughing so hard they were practically in tears. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55317) - you deserved it (2251)
On 01/09/2012 at 6:01pm - misc - by fuckparents (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I asked a waiter at a restaurant if I could go in the kitchen to compliment the chef. She turned out to be really pretty, so trying to be cool, I leaned back onto what I thought was a table. It turned out to be a stove, and my shirt caught fire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8612) - you deserved it (21876)
On 01/08/2012 at 8:51pm - love - by Tiana - United States
Today, I was bored and started touching myself watching TV. My mother walked into my bedroom with a phone in her hand and yelled, "Stop jacking off and talk to your grandmother." FML
I agree, your life sucks (14048) - you deserved it (22184)
On 01/08/2012 at 7:43pm - intimacy - by caught - United States (Washington)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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