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Today, I was at the lake watching a romantic sunset with my boyfriend. He tenderly started touching my thigh, then started shaking my leg to the rhythm while singing the J-E-L-L-O theme song. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33592) - you totally deserved it (4925)
On 08/16/2009 at 10:32am - intimacy - by juliaspaperbags (woman) - United States (Maine)
Today, brand new cocktail dress: $300. Matching peep toe heels: $100. Getting my hair done at the salon: $80. Treating myself to a mani/pedi: $50. When finally meeting the guy I have been chatting online with for 2 months, I find out hes my cousin: priceless. FML
I agree, your life sucks (67178) - you totally deserved it (21356)
On 04/10/2009 at 2:42pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I made the mistake of sneezing in front of a hyper religious customer, who for ten minutes proceeded to blame the incident of shifting weather patterns that signaled the return of Jesus, who was as she explained, upset about the abortion rates in America and President Obama. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51326) - you totally deserved it (2637)
On 04/08/2009 at 6:26am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I work at a Subway Sandwich store right next to a big hospital. There was a big line of people all getting their subs toasted. Without turning around, I ask the next person in line "I bet you want yours extra toasted?" She was a burns victim from the hospital. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24582) - you totally deserved it (47542)
On 04/05/2009 at 9:48am - work - by 00Evan (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I was in IKEA, furniture shopping with my dad. He was looking at one couch that was particularly small. I said "dad that couch is for like a midget." I look over to see a midget looking at me, sitting on the same couch in a different color. He definitely heard me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17467) - you totally deserved it (41405)
On 04/04/2009 at 11:40pm - misc - by Nikki (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, this girl and I were chilling in my apartment and things got heated up and we started making out. One thing lead to another and the next thing I knew she was giving me head. I was getting ready to bust when she stopped, looked up into my eyes and said "Do you believe in Jesus?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (110886) - you totally deserved it (13397)
On 03/26/2009 at 7:41am - intimacy - by JAY22 (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, as I was getting my mail, I received a free coupon from a baby supply store saying "congratulations on your expectancy." Thinking it was a mistake, I showed my girlfriend, who I am living with. All she had to say was "Surprise!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (54673) - you totally deserved it (9063)
On 03/20/2009 at 5:04pm - kids - by daddy-to-be (man) - United States (New York)
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