calilovesneb

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calilovesneb

19Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 22 May 1988 (28 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5703
  • Number of comments : 102
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

About calilovesneb : .

calilovesneb's page activity

Visits<b>egnur_mas</b> - yesterday at 7:21am<b>AlexOrban</b> - the 06/25/2016 at 9:09pm<b>paigexox0</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 11:09pm<b>hullarms</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 10:48am<b>TheRealStunts</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 5:48am<b>Addiepop</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 4:15pm<b>thewoodinator96</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 6:50am<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 2:53pm<b>CyanChameleon</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 5:03am<b>billboob</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 7:07pm<b>roman11</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 8:09am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 6:26pm<b>ZiaBerry</b> - the 04/19/2016 at 3:34am<b>Jeremybking</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 11:04pm<b>george_s_4</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 7:54am<b>Helipilot86</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 1:00pm<b>Gooddrark</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 5:25pm<b>ImaginaryFuture</b> - the 03/31/2016 at 3:38am

Fucked!<b>AlexOrban</b> - the 06/26/2016 at 3:08am<b>billboob</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 1:08am<b>ZiaBerry</b> - the 04/19/2016 at 9:34am<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 03/20/2016 at 5:22pm<b>SorrowsReward</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 8:30am<b>FieldLeftBlank</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 12:18am<b>trey600rr</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 3:11am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 6:37pm<b>axfabxdisaster</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 9:27pm<b>dom_g</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 7:10am<b>GeorgiaBea</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 4:54am<b>kieraphernelia</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 8:47am<b>GalaxyShots</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 1:45pm<b>arano</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 1:25am<b>hasanjk</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 3:27pm<b>kantalita_claire</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 12:20am<b>derp_taco</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 5:59am

calilovesneb's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of calilovesneb's badges

calilovesneb's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to my son's soccer game. I cheered his name at the top my lungs and waved with a grin on my face. I saw him whisper something to a team mate so I watched the film my husband took later that night. His friend asked, "Who is that?" and my son replied, "I don't know some fat bitch." FML

by Anonymous / 04/22/2009 at 5:46pm / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, was my birthday. I purposely didn't log onto facebook all day so that I could read all my birthday wishes at once. When I logged on at the end of the day I had one notification. My "friend" had commented on a picture of me, saying I looked like jabba the hut. FML

by happybirthday / 04/22/2009 at 3:42pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend and he brushed my hair out of my eyes. Then he smiled and said "Your eyes are two different colors right now. One's blue, one's green..." I was so happy he still noticed the little things. Then he finished his sentence with "...ya know, like a dog." FML

by Anonymous / 04/03/2009 at 10:37am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, a 7-year-old girl came up to me and told me to go fuck myself. I told her to watch her language or else I'd tell her parents. Her mom happened to be nearby and actually heard the conversation; she came up to me and told me to go fuck myself as well. FML

by Wmsys32pr9 / 03/30/2009 at 1:06am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, I was playing with my kid cousin outside. It was warm, so I was wearing my new bikini, and felt pretty good about myself. She suddenly turns to me and asks: "How come your tits are so small when you have such a big belly?" FML

by Chubs / 03/29/2009 at 8:32am / Norway (Sor-Trondelag) / Kids

Today, is my 16th birthday. Thinking that my parents would be out of town for it like they had every other year, I decided it would be fun to tan nude in my backyard. Apparantly my parents set up a surprise party for my sweet 16. I was standing naked infront of half my school. FML

by badbirthday / 03/16/2009 at 4:51pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, in a very crowded public restroom at a sporting arena, after looking to the man using the urinal to his right, my 6 year old son turns to address me on his left and exclaims, "Daddy, that man's wiener is a lot bigger than yours!" The whole bathroom heard and looked immediately at me. FML

by SadDad / 03/05/2009 at 8:51pm / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, I'm playing basketball with my little brother. After jokingly blocking his shot, he turns to me and says "You're a bitch." He's 6. After asking where he heard that word, he responded with "Daddy calls you that when you're not around." FML

by lifesucks4me / 02/23/2009 at 7:51am / United States (Kentucky) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He said I was way too good at sex so I must have lied about not having much experience, and he "wouldn't be with someone who is hiding something." WTF? FML

by pchemist / 02/21/2009 at 7:13pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I complimented my mom with "Hey, I think you lost some weight." She replied with "Yeah, I think you found it." FML

by Kristina / 02/18/2009 at 4:09pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I texted this girl I really like and she didn't answer. She did about two hours later and it said "sorry I was having sex at the time you texted me. So how are you?" FML

by Mr. Hopeless / 02/13/2009 at 4:59pm / United States (Wyoming) / Intimacy

Today, I went to Subway to grab some lunch. As I was paying, the cashier gave me a tip. He told me of a great acne medication that would do wonders. Thanks. FML

by chichi / 02/07/2009 at 3:09pm / United States (Florida) / Transportation

Today, I got a haircut and the first thing the lady asked was "so do you want to keep the mullet?". What mullet?! FML

by Noname / 01/30/2009 at 2:06pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I danced with a girl until the bar closed. We went back to my place. She had a penis. FML

by Noname / 01/22/2009 at 6:27pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, my ex-boyfriend who I am still in love with sends me a text message that says "I miss you, baby". It turns out my name comes right after his girlfriend's name on his contact list. FML

by yeah... / 01/22/2009 at 5:47pm / United States (Ohio) / Love