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calilovesneb

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calilovesneb

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 22 May 1988 (26 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2843
  • Number of comments : 102
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

About calilovesneb : .

calilovesneb's page activity

Visits<b>TheMrJoee</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 7:41pm<b>gingerJ</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 10:18pm<b>gej12345</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 8:52pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 4:38pm<b>The3BodyProblem</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 2:38pm<b>CuriousYel1ow</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 9:27am<b>xxRAGINGxDILDOxx</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 10:21pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 4:33pm<b>anime8769</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 10:14pm<b>pinkydink10</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 11:41am<b>alexishbu</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 2:56pm<b>imshadyxo</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 6:01am<b>SekTr</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 4:20pm<b>sjwimmer2013</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 1:55pm<b>gucci4lyf</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 8:23pm<b>slopbear</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 10:58pm<b>Bombegranite</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 1:25pm<b>last_kings84</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 8:37am

calilovesneb's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

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You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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calilovesneb's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that my girlfriend's idea of "washing her feet" is sticking her foot in the toilet and flushing. FML

#5872159
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42238) - you deserved it (3253)

On 10/17/2009 at 10:25pm - love - by userrrrr - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I met some guys from my dad's workplace. They told him what a pretty daughter he had, to which he responded, "Nah, it's just shit-loads of makeup." FML

#5857727
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33023) - you deserved it (6754)

On 10/16/2009 at 10:04pm - misc - by SheWentCrayola (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was planning on breaking up with my girlfriend of five years in two days time. She just mailed me a care package that said, "I'd die without you." FML

#5441571
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35892) - you deserved it (12281)

On 09/24/2009 at 12:52am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to retrieve my sneakers that my wife made me leave outside the door of our hotel room. Somebody had shat in one of them. FML

#4604892
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45920) - you deserved it (6418)

On 08/17/2009 at 4:48pm - misc - by JayBausch (man) - United States (New York)

Today, at the breakfast table my mum asked me what I thought about the plumber who came to our place a couple of weeks ago. I told her that I thought he was really cute and how hard I tried to flirt with him, she nodded and told me that he is her new boyfriend and might move in with us soon. FML

#4468950
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43871) - you deserved it (5276)

On 08/12/2009 at 3:39am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, as my girlfriend was dropping me home, our goodbye kiss got kind of heavy. Still parked in my drive, we had fast, frenzied sex. After, we realised that she had never put the hand brake on and that we had rolled down my drive, blocking my dad who was patiently waiting to pull in. FML

#4407265
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13828) - you deserved it (53242)

On 08/09/2009 at 12:54pm - intimacy - by deflated - Ireland

Today, my neighbors were busted for a meth lab in their garage. Yesterday, I signed the mortgage. Welcome to our new neighborhood, kids. FML

#4071557
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42162) - you deserved it (3436)

On 07/27/2009 at 1:51am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my neighbors were busted for a meth lab in their garage. Yesterday, I signed the mortgage. Welcome to our new neighborhood, kids. FML

#4071557
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42162) - you deserved it (3436)

On 07/27/2009 at 1:51am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I came home to find my dad crying. Turns out my parents are getting divorced because my mom had an affair. With a teacher at my school. A female teacher. And the school isn't going to fire her because she's a good teacher. Every day at school I'm going to have to see her. FML

#3949695
266 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71449) - you deserved it (3429)

On 07/22/2009 at 6:43am - love - by mylifereallyISeffed (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend of 5 years admitted why his pet name for me is "his beautiful swan". Apparently, the first few years we were dating, he and his friends secretly referred to me as "the ugly duckling" because my sister was so much hotter. FML

#3611862
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53075) - you deserved it (3111)

On 07/09/2009 at 1:50pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was talking to this girl who I thought was really nice, we were having an amazing conversation, and as we stared deeply in one another's eyes she asked me "Has anyone ever seen you take a shit?". She then began telling me the story of when someone watched her. FML

#3154627
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44008) - you deserved it (3398)

On 06/23/2009 at 8:08pm - misc - by Jpah (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was peeing in the shower when my girlfriend suddenly pulled open the shower curtain in an attempt to scare me. Startled, I quickly spun around and peed all over her dress. FML

#2881104
366 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29305) - you deserved it (53074)

On 06/14/2009 at 8:46am - misc - by locksmack (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, was my wedding night. We had decided to wait until marriage to have sex. When I undressed and smiled at my new wife, she burst into tears and cried, "please don't make me do this." FML

#2200863
538 comments

I agree, your life sucks (207933) - you deserved it (22334)

On 05/23/2009 at 12:44am - intimacy - by honeymoondisaster (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I thought it would be funny to sneak up behind my cat and scare it with a loud "boo!" The cat responded by jumping up, and running across my apartment, which would have been fine, except for the fact she left a trail of liquid shit everywhere she went. FML

#1930454
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16974) - you deserved it (94659)

On 05/14/2009 at 1:46pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my girlfriend's mother called her in the bedroom for a serious talk. I overheard them arguing and yelling at each other. It turns out her mother found a condom next to her garbage. We got caught because her cat swallowed the condom and threw it up. FML

#1520851
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53558) - you deserved it (18593)

On 05/01/2009 at 10:28am - intimacy - by badluckdrew (man) - United States (Wisconsin)



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