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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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caits13

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caits13
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4402
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 8 posted

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caits13's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my 3 year old daughter to behave or I'd spank her. She looked right at me and said "Bring it." FML

#13026235 (456)

I agree, your life sucks (22862) - you deserved it (19828)

On 09/12/2010 at 9:38pm - kids - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, my dad walked in on me singing "Bohemian Rhapsody", while spinning in circles with the cat in my arms. I thought I was home alone. FML

#12797830 (167)

I agree, your life sucks (8530) - you deserved it (17028)

On 08/29/2010 at 12:54am - animals - by Hobbsie - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me because she said I was more of a woman than she was. I yelled out, "I HATE YOU!" and started to cry. She then took a tampon out of her purse, handed it to me, laughed, and walked away. FML

#12082068 (348)

I agree, your life sucks (12500) - you deserved it (49191)

On 07/24/2010 at 6:53am - misc - by GirlishMan1883897 (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was outside when a mouse ran toward my feet. There was a wall behind me, so I tried to jump over him. He changed course, and I landed on him. It crunched. FML

#11940720 (161)

I agree, your life sucks (25006) - you deserved it (5353)

On 07/17/2010 at 10:54am - misc - by killer (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, the airport security guard told me to lift my fat rolls so he could finish patting me down. FML

#11935766 (209)

I agree, your life sucks (17378) - you deserved it (30632)

On 07/17/2010 at 2:16am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my physics teacher accidentally lit me on fire. FML

#9184901 (388)

I agree, your life sucks (42938) - you deserved it (4389)

On 03/18/2010 at 11:22am - health - by human torch - United States

Today, while in bed, my nose became runny. Being as tired as I was, I decided to ignore it until the morning. Turns out it was a nose bleed, and my pillowcase is ruined. FML

#8844712 (193)

I agree, your life sucks (5769) - you deserved it (15728)

On 03/05/2010 at 1:31pm - misc - by RustyGuy (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was on the train when I fell asleep. Everything would have been fine but I was suddenly jerked awake by the very loud sound of my own fart, followed by the stares of many strangers. FML

#8763974 (57)

I agree, your life sucks (14472) - you deserved it (3760)

On 03/02/2010 at 12:05am - misc - by sleeper - Sent from mobile version

Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML

#8751188 (453)

I agree, your life sucks (33670) - you deserved it (6913)

On 03/01/2010 at 5:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found a $100 bill on the ground and was thinking, "I'm so lucky!!" I opened my wallet to find that $300 was missing. I looked back and saw some random guy picking up $300. FML

#8750988 (223)

I agree, your life sucks (15946) - you deserved it (4206)

On 03/01/2010 at 4:55pm - money - by sdauner - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I'm in the hospital because I sliced my leg open. Why? I jumped off my bed and scratched myself on the metal bed frame when Miss America was crowned to Miss Virginia. I'm 20 years old, and a man. FML

#7744599 (238)

I agree, your life sucks (4728) - you deserved it (19549)

On 01/31/2010 at 1:37pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my family bet me $20 to wear a Disney Princess hat for the entire day around a theme park. I am 17 years old. We decided to go for lunch in one of the restaurants. After we finished, a woman gave my parents a leaflet on how to cope with disabled children. FML

#4717200 (164)

I agree, your life sucks (25211) - you deserved it (6623)

On 08/21/2009 at 7:51pm - misc - by Becky (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, I was at a clothing store. I tried on a dress, but decided it was too much for me. Taking it off, I realize my hair was tangled in the big security button. The employees had to bring me to the front of the store, lay me on the counter, and take the button out in front of a laughing crowd. FML

#4483949 (63)

I agree, your life sucks (31177) - you deserved it (2652)

On 08/12/2009 at 8:10pm - misc - by ForeverEmbarrassed (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while in the shower, my roomates thought it would be really funny if they threw my cat in with me. The doctor who gave me the stitches also thought so. FML

#4380799 (85)

I agree, your life sucks (37562) - you deserved it (1638)

On 08/08/2009 at 5:35am - animals - by N1ch0la1 (man) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tree!" He then continued to latch onto me for a good five minutes pretending to eat my hair. FML

#4046377 (746)

I agree, your life sucks (81746) - you deserved it (24052)

On 07/26/2009 at 1:57am - love - by treegirl (woman) - United States