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About caitlynnbby : :)
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I was driving home from work with the window down. I felt what I thought was rain coming through the window, until I looked over and realized it was urine mist coming from the cattle truck next to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24470) - you deserved it (2076)
On 11/08/2011 at 6:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my girlfriend came to my house crying because the guy who she has been cheating on me with doesn't want to be with her anymore. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43669) - you deserved it (2736)
On 11/05/2011 at 11:40am - love - by oink401 - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was dared to walk home through a rough part of town. My rep hung in the balance, so I accepted. A kid kicked a football in my direction, so I kicked it back at him hard. It hit him in the nuts, and the next thing I know, I'm running for my life from three bald, shirtless, six-packed thugs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3804) - you deserved it (8963)
On 11/04/2011 at 9:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, my 12 year-old daughter asked me where her scrotum is. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9101) - you deserved it (1669)
On 11/02/2011 at 4:18pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States
Today, it's my first Halloween in America since moving from Russia. While handing candy to children, my roommate told me to compliment a little girl by saying "You have a face only a parent could love". I found out it isn't a compliment when I was punched by her Dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27709) - you deserved it (3541)
On 10/31/2011 at 8:18pm - kids - by VladyBoi (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was reading a crappy "How to spice up your marriage" book with my husband for laughs. One of the ideas was for the guy to whip his knob out, stand behind his girl and say "Can you say that into the microphone?" Now he does it every chance he gets, and I fall for it EVERY TIME. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7414) - you deserved it (24724)
On 06/07/2011 at 3:50am - intimacy - by Kate (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend and I were making out when he sweetly whispered in my ear "it's not gonna suck itself." FML
I agree, your life sucks (37794) - you deserved it (8757)
On 06/07/2011 at 2:51am - intimacy - by Username - United States (Texas)
Today, I found that the love of my life is 3.5 inches, fully erect. My cell phone is bigger than that. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55421) - you deserved it (9688)
On 04/12/2011 at 12:00am - intimacy - by Artic (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I discovered that the demonic voice that made me nearly piss myself all night, was my sister's Furby she stuck in the closet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29385) - you deserved it (5212)
On 03/06/2011 at 2:38pm - misc - by Spooked (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my son broke a window at school playing football. Not only did he break one, he broke the other window next to it. His excuse? He tried making it look like a bird flew in one way and flew out the other. I have to pay $800 to fix it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24737) - you deserved it (3014)
On 03/06/2011 at 6:28am - money - by notsosmart - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I took a picture of myself and put it on Facebook. After I did so, I realized that in the background, you can see my crush's Facebook page up on my laptop. He tagged himself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12051) - you deserved it (33308)
On 02/24/2011 at 7:37pm - misc - by verasam01 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, while working at McDonald's, a woman asked me what came on a bacon, egg, and cheese biscuit. Trying not to laugh, I respond, "Bacon, egg, and cheese." She then realizes the stupidity of her question, and launches three dollars worth of quarters at my face and says, "Laugh at that, jerk." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23632) - you deserved it (4095)
On 09/26/2010 at 7:14pm - work - by lyssuhhhh (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was on an airplane, riding in first class for the first time in my life. The man next to me turned to me just before takeoff, stared at my chest, and said that he hoped there would be severe turbulence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25646) - you deserved it (2781)
On 09/25/2010 at 5:49pm - misc - by huj - United States (Texas)
Today, it was the first day of astronomy class and we all waited for the professor to enter the classroom. All of a sudden, someone turns the lights off, it's pitch black, and we hear the professor saying, "Greetings earthlings..." It's going to be a long semester. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15385) - you deserved it (12913)
On 09/16/2010 at 2:04am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. After removing my underwear, he started singing "In the jungle, the mighty jungle..." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19653) - you deserved it (35899)
On 07/21/2010 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by Wawawiwa (woman) - Namibia (Windhoek)
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