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Offline (the 01/04/2014 at 11:07pm)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 580
  • Number of comments : 96
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About cactusdesu : twitter @cactusdesu
instagram @musclesports

cactusdesu's page activity

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cactusdesu's FML badges

I NEED to know!

You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.


You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of cactusdesu's badges

cactusdesu's favorite FMLs

Today, my 19-year-old brother subjected me to yet another rant about how the writers of My Little Pony aren't writing the show for people like him any more, the "true fans", otherwise known as pimply-faced adults who don't use deodorant and only shower once a week. FML

by Anonymous / 12/27/2013 at 3:50pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, marks my fifth day being an English teacher's assistant. I spent it like the other four days: grading and editing terrible Teen Wolf, One Direction and Doctor Who high school fan-fiction. Six months until I get out of here. FML

by Anonymous / 12/10/2013 at 2:38am / United States (California) / Work

Today, I watched a little girl laugh while giving bread to some pigeons at a bus stop. A bus then arrived. All the pigeons moved out of the away, except one. Its head got crushed by a wheel, and some blood splattered onto the little girl's shoes, who then screamed. With laughter. FML

by B_and_W / 11/21/2013 at 6:35am / France / Kids

Today, I collected my students' notes in class to check them. One girl, who is always drawing weird anime crap in her sketchbook, turned in just one piece of paper that read, "FUCK YOUR CLASS." FML

by Mrs. Teacher / 09/17/2012 at 8:21pm / United States (Georgia) / Work

Today, it's been a week since my little brother took up his new hobby of posting "cool story, bro" in reply to almost every Facebook status and comment that I make. Not only do I already want to smash his face against a brick wall, my parents will ground me if I defriend any family members. FML

by yeah_im_mad_bro / 09/23/2011 at 8:32pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got called a "loser" by an old man wearing pink flip-flops and riding a purple moped. FML

by cooldude / 07/01/2010 at 11:19am / United States (Arkansas) / Transportation

Today, I had my girlfriend over and we we're watching a movie in my basement. I run upstairs and pop a bag of popcorn. Later I come downstairs to find my 10 year old brother sitting next to my girlfriend saying," My brother always says he wants to screw your brains out, whatever that means". FML

by CaoNiMa / 03/26/2009 at 11:42am / China (Beijing) / Kids

Today, my best friend who I have been secretly in love with forever, was ranting about her ex-girlfriend. Then she said : "If only you were gay, we'd be perfect for each other." So I took the chance to tell her I was. She responded : "Well I am still not attracted to you though." FML

by alone_forever / 03/04/2009 at 4:03pm / United States (Indiana) / Love