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cHoCoFrOG

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cHoCoFrOG

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  • Number of visits : 739
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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cHoCoFrOG's page activity

Visits<b>AyeeJoJo</b> - the 03/17/2013 at 3:38pm

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cHoCoFrOG's favorite FMLs

Today, my car keys are in my house and my house keys are in my car, and I'm in neither. FML

#20943997
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47035) - you deserved it (8458)

On 11/03/2013 at 3:18pm - misc - by Argh (man) - France (Poitou-Charentes)

Today, a shopper asked me where my nipples were. Seeing as I work in Babies'R'Us, this is a common question. I brought her over to the nursing equipment aisle where she then grabbed my nipples, gave them a twist, and walked away. I need a new job. FML

Today, I attended my first day of school 4 days after reconstructive surgery. But no worries: I'm sure my alien-like appearance and 2 hours of Darth Vader style breathing in an otherwise silent test room will make me lots of friends. FML

Today, my girlfriend's dad pulled out the chocolate flavoured condom that went missing under the couch. FML

#20819772
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41911) - you deserved it (18248)

On 08/04/2013 at 1:36am - intimacy - by Anon - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I discovered that my wife named our kids after her former lovers. We have two sons and a daughter. FML

#20819538
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48662) - you deserved it (4865)

On 08/03/2013 at 11:29pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Delaware)

Today, I was at the store with my kids. My 5-year-old son wanted to carry the milk carton, so I let him. He dropped it and it spilled. I was really embarrassed. Then he decided to get on the floor and lick the milk off the ground. Everyone stared at me accusingly. FML

#20819263
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43831) - you deserved it (6632)

On 08/03/2013 at 8:46pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was convinced by my friends to watch an episode of the American TV show "Here Comes Honey Boo Boo". They said it was bad, but I didn't anticipate having a full-blown panic attack ten minutes into it. FML

#20819060
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40782) - you deserved it (8890)

On 08/03/2013 at 5:57pm - health - by WTF, America? (man) - Sweden

Today, my mother and I were discussing how we couldn't believe it's been nearly a year since my dad died. Not paying attention, my husband absentmindedly added, "Time flies when you're having fun." FML

#20804154
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44200) - you deserved it (3252)

On 07/26/2013 at 3:06am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out my "wonderful" boyfriend was recently dumped by another woman, not just after he started stalking her, but after he wrote her a love letter in his own blood. FML

#20792358
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50208) - you deserved it (3697)

On 07/19/2013 at 1:34pm - love - by cheated (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me at his parents' house. I was overjoyed. His mom hugged me with tears in her eyes. His father, who never really spoke before, hugged me a few hours later when we were alone, his hands traveling to my ass and whispering, "I can change your mind." FML

#20788139
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67799) - you deserved it (3952)

On 07/17/2013 at 10:20am - misc - by ilivehere (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

#20787584
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57198) - you deserved it (6782)

On 07/17/2013 at 12:48am - animals - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend and I were out cliff jumping, when for the first time, he told me he loved me. I panicked and pushed him over the edge and into the water. He's now in hospital. FML

#20770545
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30208) - you deserved it (66591)

On 07/08/2013 at 1:27pm - love - by Erica (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while at the doctor's, a week overdue with my first child, I was told that sex and orgasms can sometimes help to induce labor. On the way home, my boyfriend asked for road head, arguing that "She said that stuff about orgasms." Not you, honey. FML

#20770510
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56565) - you deserved it (6531)

On 07/08/2013 at 1:03pm - intimacy - by realitybites (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my grandma's new dildo arrived in the mail. We buried her yesterday. FML

#20731352
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69036) - you deserved it (3960)

On 06/17/2013 at 12:43pm - intimacy - by hinting (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was going through my daughter's contacts, except all of them had names from Harry Potter. I found the name "Mom." I was relieved I didn't have some silly name, until I realized it wasn't my number; it was her father's new wife. My number was under "Voldemort." FML

#20726673
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47914) - you deserved it (20249)

On 06/15/2013 at 12:19am - kids - by Jill (woman) - United States (California)



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