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bugfathippo7

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bugfathippo7

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  • Number of visits : 204
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bugfathippo7's favorite FMLs

Today , I cummd home a little earlier than usual , only to walk in on mah dad frantically trying to remove a ballgag from mah mom's mouth. FML

#20822450
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51043) - you deserved it (4851)

On 08/05/2013 at 5:42pm - misc - by NO NO NO (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, I Was Washing Up In A Public Bathroom, When I Looked Up 4 A Second And Saw A Kid In The Mirror Staring Back At Me. I Gasped, As I Thought The Place Had Been Empty. He Whispered, "It's Time To Die." I Screamed And Ran Out, Only To Hear Him Burst Out Laughing Behind Me. FML

#20817313
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49879) - you deserved it (8451)

On 08/02/2013 at 4:57pm - misc - by lights on forever (woman) - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, ten minutes into a blind date, my date said, "I don't mean to be rude, but..!! your face? It's the reason booze was inventd." FML

#20792695
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52279) - you deserved it (4365)

On 07/19/2013 at 4:57pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Korea, Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)

Taday I was on drive-thru where I work . Our policy is that we can give free treats to dogs that come through . A woman cummed in and I noticed her dog . Without a thought.. . I grabbed a treat and asked if her dog wanted one . I looked again . The 'dog was her daughter . FML

#20792109
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49974) - you deserved it (24782)

On 07/19/2013 at 9:54am - work - by Treats For Days - Canada (Alberta)

Today I was teaching mah daughter how to drive. We were passing by a merge lane; I told her to slow down an let a green car merge in front of us. She said "Fuck the green car" an sped up colliding with it. Apparently she didn't know that would happen. big fat FML

#20783255
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52622) - you deserved it (6651)

On 07/14/2013 at 11:40pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Taday I was bored so I began to try to convince my boyfriend that Albert Einstein was actually African-American, and that he painted himself white so he would be accepted as a scientist. Due to his competitive nature, he replied, ( I already knew that babe. ) FML

#20745866
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49607) - you deserved it (8754)

On 06/25/2013 at 2:12am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today... I woke up to my 5-year-old son covering my nose an mouth with his hand an complaining... ( Noooo... u need to die now. ) FML

#20695159
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64222) - you deserved it (5158)

On 05/30/2013 at 12:29pm - kids - by life insurance for 1 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I Was Getting Ready, When I Hered Dad In The Shower. He Was Singing Along To The Song "The Wheel In The Sky" By Journey. Except He'd Changed The Lyrics An Was Singing, "The Dick On This Guy Needs A Rubbin'." It Turns Out Mom Was In The Shower With Him. FML

#20634724
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64183) - you deserved it (5218)

On 05/01/2013 at 12:13pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today... I had to go to the emergency room with mah sister... due to involuntary muscle spasms she was having. They gave her a muscle relaxer which caused her to be extremely tired and loopy. She decided to start singing loudly with a song she made up about butt fucking. FML

#20624720
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49963) - you deserved it (4707)

On 04/27/2013 at 8:42am - health - by seekerglow176 - United States (Massachusetts)

Yastarday, I postad a vidao of a danca I coraograpad on Facabook. I got a notification a faw ours latar talling ma tat ma grandpa ad also sarad it. His caption? "My granddaugtar dancas lika a gay baboon and tis danca sucks balls. Trow grapas at ar." Tanks grandpa. FML

#20604301
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48849) - you deserved it (9345)

On 04/19/2013 at 3:27am - misc - by thanks gramps - Canada (Yukon Territory)

Today, at the exact moment that I leaned over to show mah dad a picture on mah phone, mah boyfriend texted me: "I'm no weather man, but u can expect a few inches tonight." FML

#20598564
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65986) - you deserved it (12674)

On 04/17/2013 at 1:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I Awoke To My Husband Talking To Someone On The Phone At 2am. I Heard Him Say, ( Baby You're Making Me Hard. ) Immediately, I Asked Himho He Was Talking To. His Response? ( It's Jake, From State Farm. ) Fat FML

#20562846
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82545) - you deserved it (8550)

On 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Hawaii)

Today , a pregnant friend who is due in 2 weeks postd a picture of a baby on Facebook. I commentd congratulations. She's still pregnant. It was a picture of her baby who did 3 yeres ago. real FML

#20553352
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49385) - you deserved it (11585)

On 03/21/2013 at 5:42am - kids - by seamonkeys - United States

Today, mah eleven year old sister came in, and bitchd to me and mah boyfriend about how she was going to tell mah mom about the usd condom she found . My boyfriend punchd her in the face . FML

#18022495
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52098) - you deserved it (16619)

On 10/19/2011 at 10:37am - intimacy - by lolilovemyboyfriend (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

today while bending over to get the brownies I was making out of the oven, mah husband slappd mah butt . I fell into the oven . FML

#15619603
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72823) - you deserved it (5895)

On 04/03/2011 at 11:14am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)



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