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bubba919's favorite FMLs
by keerow / 02/26/2013 at 10:54am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I got stuck in traffic when a shootout started somewhere behind. I lowered myself and suddenly a bullet punctured a hole in the rear screen. When I managed to get away, I called my wife in a panic. She didn't pick up so I sent her a text about what just happened. Her reply: "K". FML
by n3ov / 02/25/2013 at 11:33pm / Pakistan (Islamabad) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 02/25/2013 at 11:14am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my dog ate a whole case of my son's paintballs, because apparently they are made of a fish byproduct. Not only does the whole house smell like fish, there are countless bright yellow dog turds all over the house and our yard. FML
by firestar772 / 02/11/2013 at 10:48am / United States (California) / Animals
by Lois / 02/09/2013 at 7:00am / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Intimacy
by Experience / 02/05/2013 at 3:19pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
Today, I called security at my school because I left my mittens in a classroom and it was locked. When the security officer showed up, he asked if the mittens I was looking for were the ones on my hands. I even had to take one of them off to call them. FML
by swarm20 / 02/05/2013 at 12:24am / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
Today, my friend asked me to fix his laptop for him because it is loaded with viruses. When I turned it on and started searching for the problem, I couldn't find it. Luckily I was able to find a video of him banging my girlfriend. We've been together for eight years. FML
by hamandegger / 02/04/2013 at 3:17pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy
by rani / 02/02/2013 at 5:34pm / Norway (Oslo) / Love
by wilks311 / 02/02/2013 at 9:12am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Today, while trucking, I got stuck in traffic on a congested highway. After 15 minutes of mind-numbing boredom, I glanced down at the car beside me, only to witness the driver changing her tampon and flicking the old one onto the highway. I can't unsee this. FML
by thoughtidseenitall / 02/01/2013 at 8:01pm / United States (Colorado) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 01/27/2013 at 1:50pm / United States (Michigan) / Kids
by wtf dad / 01/09/2013 at 10:15pm / United States (Missouri) / Love
Today, my dad learned that it's possible to power a lightbulb with a potato. Since then, he's been going around the house removing all the plugs from the wall and plugging them into potatoes instead. He's absolutely baffled as to why it won't work. FML
by Darkandcold / 01/09/2013 at 2:23pm / United Kingdom (Devon) / Miscellaneous
by drake86 / 01/09/2013 at 11:42am / United Kingdom (Argyll and Bute) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. When he was about to orgasm, he screamed "Yes Brittany!"… Today, my boss asked to use my phone since the company pays for it. A few hours later the same boss… Today, I asked my boyfriend if he would still love me if I became a vegetable. His response: "Well,…
- Today, I had to work a double shift as a server with a multi-fractured foot because my boss decided… Today, I visited a new tattoo parlor, as my previous artist made me uncomfortable with his drunken,… Today, I found out my hours at work were getting cut and given to another employee. Not only are my…