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Offline (the 10/14/2015 at 9:03pm)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 7 January 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2235
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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bryonyb33's page activity

Visits<b>papa_vas</b> - the 03/16/2016 at 12:29pm<b>RA91</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 1:51am<b>pineapplejuicy</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 1:00am<b>JZAMORA777</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 9:23pm<b>Kuibe</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 8:12pm<b>ELITEKILLER529</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 6:53pm<b>kittyskreamz</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 10:54pm<b>Glock2012</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 11:09am<b>enter______name</b> - the 10/10/2015 at 10:04am<b>Paid4Hir3</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 7:29pm<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 6:43pm<b>dreamrules</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 3:27am<b>Yazoo77</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 6:51pm<b>amine91</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 5:58am<b>connaughty0225</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 2:39am<b>kashgillingham</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 1:44am<b>Markovski</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 3:01pm<b>Norkss</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 12:54am

Fucked!<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 12:44am

bryonyb33's FML badges

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bryonyb33's favorite FMLs

Today, I realised that I can tell my 6 cats apart by the sound of their paws on the carpet. I think I need friends. FML

by Anonymous / 07/25/2013 at 8:13pm / South Africa / Transportation

Today, trying to be funny in front of some friends, I held my cat above my head Lion King style. The height must have made him nervous, because he shat on my head. FML

by Anonymous / 07/17/2013 at 12:02pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, while waxing my bikini line, my husband thought it would be funny to scare me which caused me to close my legs. I am now sitting in the sink with my best friend pouring hot water "down there" trying to remove the wax. FML

by helpme / 07/15/2013 at 1:25pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, my naked boyfriend walked up to me with my towel around his neck and with a hard-on, then declared he was "The Penis Man" and slapped me with his junk. I thought I was dating a man, not a man-child. FML

by peniswoman / 07/14/2013 at 1:03pm / United Kingdom (Renfrewshire) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up to a strange noise. I looked over to see my drunk husband standing at the dresser. I asked him what he was doing. "Peeing." I asked him, "In the sock drawer?" There was a pause. "Am I peeing in the wrong drawer?" FML

by speechless / 07/13/2013 at 10:32am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got mauled by some wild animals and had to get my butt cheek stitched up. The embarrassment doesn't end there though; the animals in question were kittens. The nurses on duty laughed and the entire ward found out. FML

by richardmrcs / 07/08/2013 at 4:00pm / United Kingdom (Bradford) / Animals

Today, I had to remove a glass bottle, complete with an ineffective pullstring, from a patient's rectum. He claimed that he'd accidentally sat on it, and later threatened to sue me for every penny if I breathed a word of it to anyone. Oops, looks like I just did. FML

by DocKreso / 06/28/2013 at 5:59pm / Croatia (Splitsko-Dalmatinska) / Work

Today, my boss fired me for being "too morally ambiguous". I work at a bagel shop and had told a customer that I was indifferent towards cream cheese. FML

by confusedbagel / 06/27/2013 at 2:22am / United States (California) / Work

Today, it's been weeks since some asshat started placing gnomes in my front and back yards. I resorted to setting up cameras, which I thought had deterred the idiot, until I walked into my kitchen this morning and found two gnomes on the counter. Nothing on the tapes. I'm freaking out here. FML

by ilivealoneandwhatthefuck / 06/23/2013 at 1:02pm / Guam / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my family has a bet on how long I will be single for. FML

by Bridget Jones? / 06/10/2013 at 9:09am / United Kingdom (Wolverhampton) / Miscellaneous

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

by tinypenis / 06/04/2013 at 8:15am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my parents blew my entire college fund in their quest to finish building their replica Hobbit house in our back yard. FML

by future burger flipper / 06/03/2013 at 3:22pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Money

Today, I witnessed a large woman pee on a pregnancy test in the middle of a Walmart parking lot, clean herself off, then wander around with the test hanging out of her mouth, waiting for her result. Where in the name of Christ do these people come from? FML

by Anonymous / 06/02/2013 at 2:10pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, thanks to an idiotic, "hilariously edgy" advert that screened in the very early evening, my 6-year-old son keeps repeating the phrase "I want a vasectomy" to everyone he sees. I've never received so many dirty looks in my life. FML

by theybitchaboutgnomesbutnotthis?? / 05/31/2013 at 6:25pm / United Kingdom (Devon) / Kids

Today, I was walking down the stairs with my guitar in hand, singing "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing" to my wife. I sang, "I don't wanna close my eyes, I don't wanna fall". Before I could say "asleep", I fell down the stairs. My wife almost pissed her pants laughing. My bum hurts. FML

by Anonymous / 05/28/2013 at 12:37pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Love