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bryan21122112

Offline (the 02/18/2015 at 6:43am) | Search for a member

bryan21122112

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1324
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About bryan21122112 : Don't be ignorant and I won't have a reason to dislike you.

bryan21122112's page activity

Visits<b>Dcaxcs</b> - the 02/24/2014 at 11:52pm<b>hunteryager</b> - the 09/07/2013 at 8:14am<b>_oGSwank</b> - the 01/22/2013 at 8:33pm<b>Beeftinkle</b> - the 01/18/2013 at 8:52am<b>BunchieRules</b> - the 01/17/2013 at 11:38pm<b>RevengeIsSweet</b> - the 01/17/2013 at 10:52pm

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50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

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bryan21122112's favorite FMLs

Today, my dog, who has been specially trained to go for help when I'm having a seizure, went to alert my parents downstairs that I was having an emergency. The "emergency" was me masturbating. FML

#20052579
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35978) - you deserved it (11113)

On 09/01/2012 at 1:56pm - intimacy - by thewhompingwillow (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my dad wants me to spray a wasp nest, because I'm the fittest family member and can run the fastest. The wasps are already angry, and I'm allergic to them. FML

#20052266
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26333) - you deserved it (1714)

On 09/01/2012 at 10:09am - health - by iliveintexas - United States (Texas)

Today, a small kid looked at me, screamed in terror, and hid behind his dad. I was just walking down the same aisle in the store. This is far from the first time it's happened. FML

#20051755
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22549) - you deserved it (2907)

On 09/01/2012 at 12:07am - kids - by KidKillah - United States (California)

Today, I was feeling depressed and got very, very drunk. This evening, I was feeling equally desperate, and ended up having to get my special dildo removed from my asshole at the hospital. FML

#20051425
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13489) - you deserved it (37928)

On 08/31/2012 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by pride? what's that? :( (woman) - Belgium (Vlaams-Brabant)

Today, I bought some perfume that I thought smelled absolutely amazing. Later, my boyfriend walked in, sniffed, and said, "What smells like bacon?" The bottle cost $83. They won't take a refund. FML

#20050522
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18170) - you deserved it (8597)

On 08/31/2012 at 3:06am - misc - by baconlady (woman) - United States

Today, I bought some perfume that I thought smelled absolutely amazing. Later, my boyfriend walked in, sniffed, and said, "What smells like bacon?" The bottle cost $83. They won't take a refund. FML

#20050522
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18170) - you deserved it (8597)

On 08/31/2012 at 3:06am - misc - by baconlady (woman) - United States

Today, I was playing with my vibrator. I was getting close when all of a sudden it short-circuited and made a sound like a laughing clown, scaring me half to death. FML

Today, I had to explain to my teacher that Czechoslovakia is no longer a country. She kicked me out of class when she found out I was right. FML

#20049540
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29422) - you deserved it (1932)

On 08/30/2012 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Maine)

Today, after finishing a song during karaoke, a man came up to me and held out his hand. Quite flattered, I shook it, said thanks and that I was glad he enjoyed it. Turns out he was next and just wanted the microphone. FML

#20049122
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18790) - you deserved it (9206)

On 08/30/2012 at 4:52am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I discovered why my girlfriend is so obsessed with cutting my nails. She collects my clippings in a jar under her bed. She claims it will keep us together longer. FML

#20049093
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30577) - you deserved it (2385)

On 08/30/2012 at 4:04am - misc - by freaked out - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I had to force myself to take a dump at school, even though I have severe restroom anxiety and shyness. I had finally relaxed enough to go when the tornado drills went off mid-dump, and 46 students and teachers packed into the bathroom with me. FML

#20048959
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35703) - you deserved it (2440)

On 08/30/2012 at 1:55am - misc - by DamnTornadoAlley - United States (Texas)

Today, yet again, I was getting intimate with my shower head. Some complete genius decided to flush the toilet downstairs halfway through, which sent scalding-hot water all up in my privates. I've yet to find a comfortable sitting position. FML

#20046536
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16572) - you deserved it (38574)

On 08/28/2012 at 5:22pm - intimacy - by Bethany (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was dumped by my boyfriend. He claimed that it's because he's an agent fighting the Mafia, and he doesn't want to put my life at risk through reprisal attacks. FML

#20045057
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21758) - you deserved it (2276) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/27/2012 at 6:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went to see my orthodontist. He informed me that I have an underbite and I will probably need braces again. I just had them taken off last year, after five and a half years of oral hell. FML

#20044922
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23830) - you deserved it (1873)

On 08/27/2012 at 6:16pm - health - by Albert (man) - United States (New Jersey)



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