bryan21122112

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Offline (the 02/18/2015 at 6:43am)

bryan21122112

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1601
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About bryan21122112 : Don't be ignorant and I won't have a reason to dislike you.

bryan21122112's page activity

Visits<b>Dcaxcs</b> - the 02/24/2014 at 11:52pm<b>hunteryager</b> - the 09/07/2013 at 8:14am<b>_oGSwank</b> - the 01/22/2013 at 8:33pm<b>Beeftinkle</b> - the 01/18/2013 at 8:52am<b>BunchieRules</b> - the 01/17/2013 at 11:38pm<b>RevengeIsSweet</b> - the 01/17/2013 at 10:52pm

bryan21122112's FML badges

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Up and coming moderator

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50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

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bryan21122112's favorite FMLs

Today, I was slapped across the face by a girl in the waiting room at the dentist's office. She thought I was taking a picture of her breasts with my phone. I was smiling while reading other people's FMLs. FML

by karmamaybe / 12/03/2012 at 3:35pm / United States (South Dakota) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got into a fight with my girlfriend. After yelling and arguing my point, my cat got up and jumped up next to her on the bed. He sat down, and they both glared at me until I left. FML

by Anonymous / 12/03/2012 at 2:02pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm breaking up with her because she's very abusive. After a couple of seconds of awkward silence, she kicked me in the nuts and ran away. FML

by Anonymous / 12/03/2012 at 6:53am / Canada / Love

Today, I walked out of my apartment to see that someone had climbed onto the hood of my car and taken a shit on my windshield. I only moved in a couple of weeks ago. FML

by poopsthegame / 12/03/2012 at 2:36am / United States (Hawaii) / Transportation

Today, at a talent show, my band got booed before we even started playing. FML

by disembob / 12/02/2012 at 9:26pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend got into the Christmas cheer while giving me a hand job, smashing my nuts with her palm in time to her humming of Jingle Bells. FML

by fineididntwantkidsanyway / 12/02/2012 at 6:39pm / Australia (South Australia) / Intimacy

Today, my son turned 8. We watched as he unwrapped a $55 Nerf gun, extra 'bullets', new shoes and a school bag with his favorite TV character on the front and a action figure inside. As he finished he looked me straight in the eyes and says, "That's great ma, but seriously what'd you get me?". FML

by Anonymous / 12/02/2012 at 3:19am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids

Today, my guy friend kept complaining that no one had asked him to the dance, so he probably wasn't going to go. I suggested that we go together. He laughed until his face was bright red and said, "I don't think I'll ever get that desperate." FML

by Anna / 12/02/2012 at 3:03am / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, while lighting a cigarette, I learned the hard way that the amount of styling mousse I used to get my curly hair to become manageable, is the roughly same amount that causes it to become highly flammable. FML

by Awkward / 12/01/2012 at 5:11pm / Bahrain / Health

Today, my husband discovered poking me in my belly button makes me have to pee, sometimes it's uncontrollable and happens immediately. He thinks it's hilarious and decided it's his new favorite game. FML

by Anonymous / 12/01/2012 at 12:01pm / United States (Oregon) / Love

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex when the condom broke. He told me to go put a tampon in to "soak up the kids". How did he graduate? FML

by me. / 12/01/2012 at 9:54am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I brought a boy over to my house to help with a history project. My mom suddenly swooped in and bombarded him with questions about his and my sex life, and how she wants to have exactly four grandchildren. FML

by Anonymous / 12/01/2012 at 1:06am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I followed my neighbor's advice and sprayed Sprite on my Christmas tree because it will "make it live longer." I just came downstairs to find my Christmas tree covered in ants. FML

by Chuffy / 12/01/2012 at 1:01am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was out clubbing, when I saw a pair of very cute girls sitting at the bar, so I went over, hoping to introduce myself. I swung my leg over the stool, and through no fault of my own, sat on my own balls. I quickly got thrown out for "harassing the ladies." FML

by Anonymous / 11/30/2012 at 7:31pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend confronted me for forgetting to take the trash out. At some point during the argument, I tried to calm her down, and the words "I should of" escaped my lips. She spent the next ten minutes calling me stupid and laughing at how my grammar goes to hell when I'm distressed. FML

by Gus / 11/30/2012 at 2:30pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love