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brookiebaby1212

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brookiebaby1212

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brookiebaby1212's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house waiting for him to get out of the shower. Bored, I sent my friend a picture of myself pretending to make out with his bear rug. After the photo shoot, I looked in the doorway to find his dad staring at me. FML

#12908327
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8364) - you deserved it (29730)

On 09/04/2010 at 10:22pm - misc - by jentea (woman) - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

#12677495
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41656) - you deserved it (12552)

On 08/22/2010 at 2:58am - kids - by Bailey - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my Mom felt the need to walk around school and tell everyone to be nice to me because I just started my period. FML

#12616520
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55900) - you deserved it (3680)

On 08/19/2010 at 12:12am - intimacy - by Jordid - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was babysitting for my mum's friend. I put her little boy on my knee, and he kept pulling at my top. I asked him "are you hungry?" He replied "No, I want to see your titties." FML

#12305756
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38255) - you deserved it (10202)

On 08/04/2010 at 6:25am - intimacy - by Embarressed... (woman) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. He went outside for a "breather" and never came back. FML

#12300042
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50043) - you deserved it (8297)

On 08/04/2010 at 12:20am - love - by Alisha Marie - United States (New York)

Today, I was looking through my boyfriends phone, when I found a naked picture of myself. Too bad I haven't sent him any. Ever. FML

#12187876
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34636) - you deserved it (13546)

On 07/29/2010 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by Sunshine.0.ninja - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was helping my friend create an online dating profile. When she got her search results, her #1 match was a blonde guy only 10 miles from her. His description: genuine, laid back, and ready for fun. He left off something kind of important. He's already married. To me. FML

#11983627
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (97731) - you deserved it (5641)

On 07/19/2010 at 1:36pm - love - by betrayed (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was riding the train and saw a cute guy licking his lips at me. Flattered, I gave him my number when the train stopped. He looked at me and said, "Don't flatter yourself. You have mustard on your face." FML

#11966338
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28292) - you deserved it (17648)

On 07/18/2010 at 5:47pm - misc - by anonmys - United States (California)

Today, I learned that you should never, ever, under any circumstance, take a laxative and a sleeping pill on the same night. FML

#11281809
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10888) - you deserved it (51063)

On 06/18/2010 at 1:42am - health - by emilygreeny - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. While I was asleep, he drew a face on my stomach and when I woke up he was talking to it. He said it would be less weird if he was talking to my stomach with a face on it, representing the baby. According to him, our child is going to have a mustache. FML

#11198427
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18764) - you deserved it (24998)

On 06/14/2010 at 7:13pm - kids - by gibsonSG323 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend came home while I was making a snack in the kitchen. We started making out and he lifted me up and sat my ass on the hot stove. FML

#10870202
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35807) - you deserved it (7305)

On 05/30/2010 at 8:27pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, fifteen minutes after dinner was served, my blind date says "It's good that you're smart. Not to be rude, but most girls aren't. I mean, at some point, I'm going to pull my dick out of your mouth and then it's good if you have something interesting to say." Check please. FML

#9643258
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40778) - you deserved it (7563)

On 04/05/2010 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Hate2Date (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, when I went to see a movie with my best friend, and there were 3 girls loudly discussing blow job techniques. I texted my boyfriend about how gross the conversation was. His reply was "Pay attention. You might learn something." FML

#8966717
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11846) - you deserved it (24747)

On 03/10/2010 at 6:05am - intimacy - by ohno - United States

Today, I was driving with my mom. She had some soda with her from earlier, and even though it was probably warm, I was thirsty. I ask for a sip, she hands it to me and says sure. And I get a mouthful of ash-and-cigarette-butt-filled soda. Apparently she didn't feel the need to mention this to me. FML

#8637899
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25448) - you deserved it (2995)

On 02/25/2010 at 11:28am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was driving with my mom. She had some soda with her from earlier, and even though it was probably warm, I was thirsty. I ask for a sip, she hands it to me and says sure. And I get a mouthful of ash-and-cigarette-butt-filled soda. Apparently she didn't feel the need to mention this to me. FML

#8637899
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25448) - you deserved it (2995)

On 02/25/2010 at 11:28am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)



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