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brewmasterg

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brewmasterg

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3912
  • Number of comments : 118
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About brewmasterg : Fuck food, I'd rather have tattoos.

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brewmasterg's favorite FMLs

Today, the dog went nuts at 3am. I searched the yard with a spotlight and machete. Nothing. He may actually just be an asshole. FML

#15184049
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23905) - you deserved it (5635)

On 03/03/2011 at 6:20am - animals - by panda -

Today, my boyfriend and I were play-wrestling on the bed, when he started to tickle me. I tried to pull away but he pushed me back down. I ended up hitting my eye on the corner of the nightstand. His comment was "this is why you shouldn't struggle." FML

#15177463
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27367) - you deserved it (7127)

On 03/02/2011 at 6:43pm - misc - by taiannalynn5 -

Today, I got stuck in a small elevator. It started to violently judder up and down after I pressed the 'Help' buzzer. The man on the intercom wouldn't stop laughing at how my voice was jumpy from the juddering movements before he called for help. FML

#15019943
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23651) - you deserved it (2490)

On 02/17/2011 at 8:31pm - misc - by stuckinalift (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I watched my grandfather try and park his car inside the storage area for shopping carts, thinking it was a parking space. FML

#14934394
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24240) - you deserved it (3068)

On 02/11/2011 at 10:46am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my professor's son died in a car accident and class has been cancelled until further notice. All my friends were delighted and cheered about it in front of me. I was dating my professor's son. FML

#14922394
305 comments

I agree, your life sucks (122406) - you deserved it (5361)

On 02/10/2011 at 1:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I got mugged. But luckily I had on my keyring the pepper spray that my husband had insisted I keep with me. Unlucky for me, my husband's co-worker, who borrowed my keys, emptied my pepper by spraying it on a brick wall one day when he was bored. FML

#14902184
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30541) - you deserved it (2645)

On 02/08/2011 at 10:27pm - misc - by Username -

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69615) - you deserved it (6561)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I realized that someone spray painted a giant black cock on the front of my house while I was asleep. I also just recently painted my entire house yellow. Yellow doesn't cover up black penis very well. FML

#14793203
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27898) - you deserved it (3598)

On 02/01/2011 at 1:37am - misc - by Stormbringer -

Today, my cat pissed in my zen garden. FML

#14718702
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13698) - you deserved it (20266)

On 01/26/2011 at 9:48am - animals - by lizzy1843 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I hit a parked car which was sticking out in the road and practically unavoidable. I left a note on the windshield saying, "You deserved to get hit - you park like an asshole." Later I realized that the paper I tore to write on was the back of my bank statement, name and address included. FML

#14463588
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7779) - you deserved it (70746)

On 01/04/2011 at 3:28pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was getting my chest waxed. The woman dipped the stick into the wax and hit her elbow, making wax fall into my eyes. FML

#14403675
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30230) - you deserved it (3270)

On 12/31/2010 at 12:58am - health - by Nickolas - United States

Today, my younger brother called me saying he's getting married. Now, I have to attend my ex's wedding. I'm the best man. FML

#14240691
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35020) - you deserved it (2774)

On 12/17/2010 at 10:07pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, in art class, we made plaster masks. We were supposed to put Vaseline on our partner's face so the plaster didn't rip their facial hair out. My partner forgot to put it on my eye brows and eye lashes. My face is now completely hairless. FML

#14217567
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31895) - you deserved it (6376)

On 12/15/2010 at 9:30pm - health - by Charlayyyy -

Today, I went into labor with my first child, and as much as I pleaded, I had to wait for my husband to finish his raid in World of Warcraft before he'd take me to the hospital. FML

#14093813
363 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67000) - you deserved it (10331)

On 12/05/2010 at 8:38am - health - by newmother (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, while having sex on the couch with my single neighbour, a beam in the couch broke. Not even slightly fazed, she said, "It's okay, my husband can fix it." Husband? FML

#14059458
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32537) - you deserved it (7864)

On 12/02/2010 at 12:02pm - intimacy - by nickyboy (man) - Australia (Western Australia)



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