Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

brenton490

Offline (15 hours ago) | Search for a member

brenton490

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 4 April 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 377
  • Number of comments : 88
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About brenton490 : Hi Im Brandon generally quiet online and offline, but sometimes you might catch my comment here and there.

brenton490's page activity

Visits<b>doctorhook86</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 11:47am<b>rainbowdog</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 3:09pm<b>Al3xv3l92</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 1:59am<b>jeffprobs</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 6:08am<b>ajs1987</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 11:40am<b>apjp</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 11:55pm<b>RMLrapemylife</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 2:07am<b>seifsoliman</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 4:08pm<b>chookiemhonster</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 2:05pm<b>Sakuraashita</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 9:21am<b>laneyk07</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 1:52am<b>tagallopes</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 2:23pm<b>SuperWhoLockian7</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 8:09am<b>grammar_nazi125</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 2:16pm<b>Juicenub</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 4:25am<b>CandyDawg</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 12:03am<b>PinkieKeen</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 6:20pm<b>Toughsky</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 6:15pm

brenton490's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of brenton490's badges

brenton490's favorite FMLs

Today, I took some heavy pain medication before calling my boyfriend. I don't remember the call, but apparently confessed to really liking corn, and faking orgasms. FML

#21165912
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42495) - you deserved it (13030)

On 06/07/2014 at 9:31am - intimacy - by Screwed (woman) - Australia

Today, I burned my right boob. I got it by eating a hot pocket and accidentally spilling the extremely hot filling. I never thought I'd get laid before. This has just confirmed it. FML

Today, after years of counseling and therapy for my anger issues, I snapped. Two words: Flappy Bird. FML

#21051812
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44315) - you deserved it (13235)

On 02/05/2014 at 10:39pm - misc - by tigerisabelle (woman) -

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was in the process of finally losing my virginity. Part-way through, my neighbour started shouting from his backyard, "Go, Nicolas! You can do it!" He was talking to his son, but the two of us have the same name. I couldn't finish. FML

#21046533
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54405) - you deserved it (6012) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/31/2014 at 4:05pm - intimacy - by prochainefois (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, as my boyfriend went to go down on me, he felt it necessary to stop at my stomach and clean the lint out of my belly button. 5ML

#21038584
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38948) - you deserved it (21159)

On 01/24/2014 at 6:34pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my university professor admitted to sometimes just winging it when she's teaching. "Yeah," she said, "sometimes I just don't get this stuff either." No wonder I'm failing. 5ML

#21038371
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41869) - you deserved it (3478)

On 01/24/2014 at 3:33pm - misc - by Profucktardor (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

#20972170
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30991) - you deserved it (14714)

On 11/27/2013 at 3:44am - health - by MissYouPieceOfSkin (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my dad came into my room, looked at my laptop, and said he could hear the porn I was watching all the way from his room. I wasn't watching porn. We soon realised it was actually coming from his mobile phone. FML

#20929016
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52851) - you deserved it (3906)

On 10/21/2013 at 3:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, my friend made an effort to draw a penis on every page in my analysis textbook in pen. I have to return this tomorrow. FML

#20700580
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42740) - you deserved it (4303)

On 06/02/2013 at 2:11am - misc - by fucker43 - United States (Georgia)



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: