Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

bree128

Search for a member

bree128

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 989
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

bree128's page activity

Visits<b>trinalporpus</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 11:59pm<b>cryssycakesx3</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 8:05pm<b>itsalanis</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 3:40pm<b>chudun</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 4:42am<b>legendaryplya</b> - the 06/14/2013 at 1:21am<b>cowsaysmooo</b> - the 03/16/2013 at 10:58am<b>thefreelove</b> - the 01/14/2013 at 11:03pm

bree128's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

bree128's favorite FMLs

Today, I wanted to try my mom's new lipstick. I opened it, baffled, examined it carefully. That's when it started to vibrate. Obviously, that wasn't a lipstick. FML

#13961412
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25143) - you deserved it (9513)

On 11/24/2010 at 12:11pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Belgium (Brabant)

Today, my boss was being a total asshole. While in the bathroom, he turned his back on me, so I gave him the finger, mouthed obscenities, and pantomimed stabbing him with a knife. He was looking in the mirror and saw everything. FML

#13947465
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8333) - you deserved it (57243)

On 11/23/2010 at 8:41am - work - by fired (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was putting my 2 year old to bed, and I began to sing to her. She reached up, put her finger over my lips, and said, "Shhh, Mommy." FML

#13896400
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36633) - you deserved it (12427)

On 11/19/2010 at 2:47am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I met my boyfriend's whole family. Between them they had about 10 teeth. FML

#13770099
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32144) - you deserved it (4557)

On 11/08/2010 at 9:25pm - love - by unknown - United States (Florida)

Today, trying to be cute, I told my soon-to-be husband he was the ying to my yang. He responded with "Baby, you're the Monica Lewinsky to my Bill Clinton." FML

#13762058
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22055) - you deserved it (7652)

On 11/08/2010 at 4:50am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was in a rush and forgot to flush the toilet after taking a huge dump. After coming home from work, I check my facebook to find myself tagged by my boyfriend in a photo. The photo was of the toilet, with the caption: "This is what Taco Bell does." FML

#13588009
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12918) - you deserved it (35612)

On 10/25/2010 at 8:32am - misc - by tanya - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had two 100's and two singles in my wallet. The two 100's was for my electric bill and the two singles were for the bus. Once I got off the bus and to the electric company, I noticed only my singles were there. Turns out I paid the bus driver $200. FML

#13570678
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15007) - you deserved it (34995)

On 10/24/2010 at 12:37am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend said he wants a Hello Kitty wedding. FML

#13559273
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36882) - you deserved it (8540)

On 10/23/2010 at 5:07am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML

#13432324
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35593) - you deserved it (20833)

On 10/13/2010 at 9:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Spain (Asturias)

Today, I was taking the subway to school. I was applying some makeup when I noticed a little boy watching me. When I was finished I heard him whisper to his mom, "I thought make up was supposed to make you pretty." FML

#12835808
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26949) - you deserved it (6040)

On 08/31/2010 at 8:11am - misc - by ugly - United States

Today, my boyfriend questioned why I always put my shirts in the dryer right before wearing them. I told him it was because the dryer causes my shirts to regain their form and tightness. His response: "You should throw your vagina in there along with them." FML

#12822018
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39294) - you deserved it (14812)

On 08/30/2010 at 1:51pm - intimacy - by FYouBoyfriend (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my four year old told my mother-in-law that our house is haunted because she hears a ghost at night saying "oh" and daddy's name as if they're hurt. FML

#12361153
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27832) - you deserved it (16650)

On 08/06/2010 at 10:35pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I texted my girlfriend that I'm going to 'lick my professor's ass' instead of 'kick' due to auto-correction on my phone. FML

#8052532
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11899) - you deserved it (23672)

On 02/09/2010 at 2:10pm - misc - by kingmetal42 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was watching TV. During a very long commercial break, I found my brothers PSP charger next to me. Out of boredom I put my tongue on the end on the metal. Not only did it fry my tongue but found its way to my metal filling in my tooth. I now have a sore tongue and a throbbing toothache. FML

#6803548
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4582) - you deserved it (70551)

On 12/17/2009 at 11:25pm - misc - by Shocked (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I forgot to do my French homework, but since it was an online worksheet, I told my teacher my internet wasn't working. I told her with an e-mail. FML

#161178
995 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69939) - you deserved it (729373)

On 02/28/2009 at 2:07pm - misc - by ihavepinkbackpac (woman) - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: