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breaksprinter_

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breaksprinter_
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 30858
  • Number of comments : 108
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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breaksprinter_'s favorite FMLs

Today, all I wanted was stress-relief sex with the guy I sleep with. Instead, I was so exhausted from my day that he thought I wasn't into it and ended up just talking to me about what we're going to do after college. Trading a booty call for a meaningful and heartfelt discussion. FML

#1468
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6398) - you deserved it (24325)

On 01/17/2009 at 3:40pm - intimacy - by Noname - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my younger brother and my parents were in my dorm room. When I wasn't looking, my brother opened the top drawer of my dresser (where I had a tube of half-used lube) and asked out loud: "What's Astroglide?" FML

#1440
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21948) - you deserved it (6428)

On 01/17/2009 at 9:25am - intimacy - by Perpetually F-ed. - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was having a cybersex chat with a "girl" on a website whilst at work. I noticed my colleague who sits next to me start cracking up with laughter. Turned out it was him I was chatting with and he was winding me up. Worst thing is it had given me a stiffy. FML

#1065
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7837) - you deserved it (34761)

On 01/14/2009 at 3:49am - intimacy - by diddlysquat - United Kingdom (Wakefield)

Today, my boyfriend and I were looking for our bubblegum flavored "numbing" lotion to have some morning fun. We couldnt find it anywhere. After about 10 minutes, my little nephew comes from my room crying and drool coming out of his mouth. He smelt like bubblegum, his mouth and tongue were all numb. FML

#997
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23028) - you deserved it (5878)

On 01/12/2009 at 10:37am - intimacy - by LiLGeek - United States (California)

Today, it's been 2 weeks since I lost my virginity and I've already had sex with 3 guys. I think I'm a nympho. FML

#723
13 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7982) - you deserved it (56921)

On 01/07/2009 at 3:16am - intimacy - by sexaddict - Sent from mobile version

Today, my mother was vacuuming my room and found a towel under my bed. She asked "why does it smell so bad?" I replied "sweat". FML

#672
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9612) - you deserved it (9652)

On 01/01/2009 at 10:04pm - intimacy - by Noname - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, me and my sister hear a buzzing noise in our parent's bedroom. We go to investigate. It's coming from a drawer. We open it up. Battery operated dildo. FML

#770
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26193) - you deserved it (3890)

On 01/01/2009 at 12:54pm - intimacy - by - Sent from mobile version



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