bradford1994

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bradford1994

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 15 August 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7568
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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bradford1994's page activity

Visits<b>renkar</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 10:02pm<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 11/27/2013 at 4:17pm<b>jadeluv</b> - the 10/03/2013 at 6:36pm<b>wackadoodle103</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 5:15pm<b>LovesSushi</b> - the 03/23/2013 at 7:51pm<b>185th_19_kilo</b> - the 03/16/2013 at 4:10am

bradford1994's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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bradford1994's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad used to stalk when he was in high school. FML

by Jololol / 05/17/2013 at 5:25am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a mosquito bite on my chest. Due to a severe allergic reaction it has swollen my left breast a cup size. The first thing my boyfriend said was, "Hey look! I can finally see one of them." FML

by Urgghh / 05/16/2013 at 5:36pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy

Today, I took my girlfriend to a family dinner. Things went great, until my grandma arrived. She thought it would be okay to continue our friendly prank war by congratulating me on my "wife's" pregnancy. My girlfriend actually believed it, and now thinks she's the "other woman". FML

by paging dr. kevorkian / 05/16/2013 at 5:23pm / Netherlands / Love

Today, I attended a cooking class with my co-workers. As the chef prepared to cut up a load of onions for his dish, he warned us to be ready for the "typical reactions". Everyone teared up. Meanwhile, I popped a boner. So much for typical. FML

by Anonymous / 05/16/2013 at 4:54pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I walked in on my sister masturbating with my curling iron. FML

by need € for new iron / 05/16/2013 at 3:49pm / Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen) / Intimacy

Today, I went to visit my sister, who lives four hours away from me. I'd only just sat down on their couch when her husband told me I needed to leave so they could have sex. FML

by earplugsplease / 05/16/2013 at 12:16pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, while on an escalator, instead of just telling me my underwear label was hanging out of my jeans, a woman behind me decided to tuck the label in herself. You should never have to feel a stranger's finger on your butt crack. FML

by violatedbuttcrack / 05/16/2013 at 6:24am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, at the supermarket, a man collapsed. I gave CPR while the cashier called for help. During this, the other patrons were complaining that no other register was open. Once the ambulance arrived, I returned to my cart to find items removed and 40 dollars taken from my purse. FML

by Anonymous / 05/16/2013 at 12:39am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, after finding out that I would never be able to move my dominant arm again, I decided to talk to my best friend about it because it was getting to me. She responded with, "It really bugs me that you made this conversation all about you." FML

by LordCrafte / 05/15/2013 at 7:43pm / Australia (Queensland) / Health

Today, while sitting at a red light with my window down, the asshat next to me flicked his still-lit cigarette away. It landed in my car and wedged between me and my seat. It burned a hole in my shirt and my seat, and burned my back and hair. FML

by Seriously? / 05/15/2013 at 5:47pm / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I was woken up by my drunk girlfriend calling me and saying how much she loves me. She then stopped to tell the guy she was in bed with to be quiet because I might hear him. FML

by Anonymous / 05/15/2013 at 4:21pm / United States / Love

Today, I found out I'm actually the uncle of my children. All four of them. FML

by Liferuinedforever / 05/14/2013 at 3:13am / Pakistan (Sindh) / Kids

Today, I learned if you type my full name in Google Images, the 3rd thing that comes up is a naked woman in ropes. Someone on Pornhub thought it was smart to comment that the girl looks just like me. She does. Now my parents think I'm a porn star, and most people at school stopped talking to me. FML

by magomag / 05/14/2013 at 12:15am / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, while doing a fun genetics game in Biology, I found out that I was adopted. Turns out the game wasn't so fun. FML

by Anonymous / 05/13/2013 at 7:51pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the supermarket when an elderly lady asked if I'd grab some coffee for her from a high shelf. The moment I took my hands off my almost-full shopping cart, she made off with it. I ended up getting thrown out by security after she claimed I was trying to steal it from her. FML

by Anonymous / 05/13/2013 at 3:49pm / United Kingdom (Swindon) / Miscellaneous