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brackaman

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brackaman

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 October 1990 (23 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1685
  • Number of comments : 359
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About brackaman : I am the most normal person you will ever meet. *twitch twitch*

brackaman's page activity

Visits<b>wondercat40</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 5:37pm<b>TheBookWyrm</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 6:37pm<b>leeleeamber</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 1:38pm<b>jenniferwoods41</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 2:12am<b>bonnnie</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 5:13am<b>DMAN80182001</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 2:14pm<b>zeriously95</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 1:19pm<b>alljackedup7</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 10:39pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 8:27am<b>squidgy787</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 9:40am<b>sarah1024</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 7:14am<b>insomniacdreamer</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 1:07am<b>ImHerelegally</b> - the 03/19/2014 at 6:15pm<b>xDochx</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 11:20pm<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 9:09am<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 3:37pm<b>irocksox2014</b> - the 02/09/2014 at 11:46pm<b>theman97</b> - the 02/05/2014 at 8:35pm

brackaman's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of brackaman's badges

brackaman's favorite FMLs

Today, while giving my girlfriend a back-rub, she moaned and commented, "If only you could fuck this well." FML

#20455279
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33052) - you deserved it (8273)

On 01/12/2013 at 12:57pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, my dad was helping me move my stuff out. I'd asked my boyfriend to deal with my sex toys and lingerie, but still my dad showed up later at my new place, handed me a box full of them all, and simply said, "I don't want to know." FML

#20454623
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20700) - you deserved it (35553)

On 01/12/2013 at 12:11am - intimacy - by nean83 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was driving without my seatbelt on, when I noticed a police car approaching. I panicked and desperately fumbled around for my seatbelt, only for them to pass by with just a funny look. Then it hit me that I was riding my motorcycle. FML

#20428799
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22571) - you deserved it (44608) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/28/2012 at 8:21pm - misc - by ELparano - Canada

Today, a girl mistook me for her boyfriend and broke up with me because I'm "a liar and a cheating bastard." I've never seen her in my life, but I'm so lonely that I tried to convince her to give me another chance and stay with me. FML

#20427124
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38584) - you deserved it (7952)

On 12/28/2012 at 12:24am - love - by Alone - United States

Today, after giving my mother and my girlfriend their Christmas presents, I realized just how similar they looked both in box size and wrapping paper. I noticed after my mother gasped upon finding a vibrator in her box. FML

#20420433
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18097) - you deserved it (50087)

On 12/25/2012 at 2:12am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I was getting pretty horny, and I thought some dirty talk would turn him on. Amid my panting, I breathed the words, "Fuck me." He then stopped and said, "Excuse me, I don't like hearing that language." and wouldn't continue until I corrected myself. FML

#20418295
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48486) - you deserved it (10113)

On 12/24/2012 at 8:32am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I received my soccer team jacket that I ordered a month ago. Trying to save money, I'd selected the "no name" option to avoid an extra $20 embroidering fee. My jacket now has "NO NAME" spelled out on the side of it, and I was charged the extra $20 dollars after all. FML

#20415162
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39010) - you deserved it (7191)

On 12/23/2012 at 12:01am - money - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, I confronted my 18-year-old daughter about her excessively lengthy showers. She said she didn't see the big deal, considering the water "comes free with the house." No dear, it doesn't. FML

#20414355
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35101) - you deserved it (5541)

On 12/22/2012 at 6:29pm - kids - by Jane (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I sent a cute, jokey text to my girlfriend saying, "Just in case the world ends, I love you." Not only did she dump me because I was an "idiot for believing in the doomsday", which I don't, she also wrote a Facebook status about it. Now everyone thinks I'm mentally unstable. FML

#20409563
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34829) - you deserved it (6403)

On 12/20/2012 at 7:37pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Norway (Vestfold)

Today, after having finally kicked my insomnia's ass after three hours, I was woken up by something I only thought happened in movies. Someone had paid for a Mariachi band to play for their girlfriend, outside my apartment, in the middle of the night. FML

#20175516
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21900) - you deserved it (1315)

On 11/23/2012 at 5:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my English professor accused me of plagiarizing a poem I submitted, because she'd read it online earlier that day. The poem was mine; I posted it after writing it for her class, and even after logging into the site to prove it, she reported me to the school. FML

Today, due to a health insurance mix up, my schizophrenic girlfriend has been off her meds for a little over a week. She's convinced I can read her mind, and if I don't stop "pretending" she'll slit my throat in my sleep. Her medication won't be available for at least another two weeks. FML

#20159457
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23630) - you deserved it (2231)

On 11/11/2012 at 7:50pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while at a stop light, I was rear-ended by a car behind me. The guy got angry at me, because according to him, I should've known that his car has poor braking distance, and so I should've moved forward a few more feet to compensate. FML

#20157954
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25474) - you deserved it (1291)

On 11/10/2012 at 7:29pm - misc - by Me - United States

Today, my husband came home drunk off his ass at 2am. He started crying on my shoulder because he couldn't go home with some beautiful woman who hit on him, because sadly for him, he's married to me. FML

#20157197
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28997) - you deserved it (2587)

On 11/10/2012 at 5:15am - love - by Helen - United States (Arkansas)



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