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boxbrandon11

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boxbrandon11
  • Town/Country : Thousand Oaks, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 17 April 1996 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 931
  • Number of comments : 69
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

About boxbrandon11 : In three words I can sum up everything Ive learned about life: it goes on
Rest in Paradise Cody Badalato you will always be in my heart❤

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boxbrandon11's favorite FMLs

Today, I had my first blow job. My girlfriend thought it would be sexy to "caress" my ball sack. By caress she meant bitch slap from side to side. FML

#4267516
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52863) - you deserved it (7093)

On 08/03/2009 at 10:37pm - intimacy - by BeboKhaos (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was peeing in a urinal at a bar. A drunk guy comes in, and seeing no urinals open, he decides to pee between my legs from behind me. He didn't have good aim. FML

#4081805
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55899) - you deserved it (2357)

On 07/27/2009 at 3:07pm - misc - by webperson04 (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was surprising my husband because our sex life is lacking. We have planned sex tuesday night, every week, with the lights off. When he came home for lunch, I was nude and waiting for him. He took one look and said, "I forgot you looked like that. Meh, I'm going back to work." FML

#3855334
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67083) - you deserved it (7516)

On 07/18/2009 at 11:51am - intimacy - by Meh (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I asked the girl I am in love with out on a date. She asked me for my name. FML

#3685752
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44811) - you deserved it (9891)

On 07/12/2009 at 2:45am - love - by nameless (man) - United States

Today, my neighbor knocked on my door and left a note that said "Please stop singing in the shower. You're terrible, and everyone in the building can hear you." FML

#3528361
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36224) - you deserved it (13466)

On 07/06/2009 at 3:33pm - misc - by WhitneyHouston (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my attractive boss sat me down in the break room to say how much she appreciated how much work I've been doing despite being a temp. She was wearing a skirt, and I couldn't take my eyes off her legs. She then patted me on the leg and said "Good Talk". It wasn't my leg. FML

#3267231
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37255) - you deserved it (16107)

On 06/27/2009 at 3:03am - work - by EmployeeOfTheMonth (man) - United States (California)

Today, my friend told me that semen was inflammable. Later at night I jacked off into a sock and then, excitedly, tried to lit the sock on fire. Turns out, semen is very much not inflammable. Naked, I shook my sock in the air so it would extinguish while my semen splashed out all over my room. FML

#3262847
368 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7084) - you deserved it (106077)

On 06/27/2009 at 12:41am - intimacy - by notinflammable (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I finally got a chance to try out my vibrator. I've never orgasmed before with a guy, so I thought there was no hope until my friend gave me the vibrator for my birthday. It was going amazing, better than sex. I was literally 2 seconds away from climaxing when the battery suddenly died. FML

#2907219
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68416) - you deserved it (13014)

On 06/15/2009 at 7:23am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I discovered that my fiancé had tried to fake his own death because he thought it would be easier than confessing to the affair he was having. FML

#2820060
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62779) - you deserved it (2821)

On 06/12/2009 at 12:41am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was sitting in my basement watching IT. I heard a knocking at my door and turned the outside lights on to see a clown outside staring in at me. I freaked out and began screaming and jumping around like a Chihuahua on drugs. My friends told me it should be on YouTube within the week. FML

#2405054
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48500) - you deserved it (8040)

On 05/29/2009 at 4:14pm - misc - by dumbo (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was standing around looking out the window at work when it became really dark and windy and started to pour. I watched a shopping cart fly across the parking lot thinking how funny it'd be if it hit someone's car. It hit mine. I need a new headlight. FML

#2392986
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17239) - you deserved it (41183)

On 05/28/2009 at 11:41pm - misc - by danyelicindereli (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was shaving my balls with a blade razor because my electric trimmer had died and I had a big date with the girl of my dreams. I moved too quickly and accidentally knicked a vein in my scrotum. I had to hold gauze over my balls until the paramedics arrived. FML

Today, my last task for the day as a high school janitor was to power-wash the concrete area where the graduation ceremony will take place. Tired and bored, I drew a huge penis with the power hose. Right before I was going to wash it off, the machine broke. Graduation is tomorrow. FML

#2350763
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15007) - you deserved it (65111)

On 05/27/2009 at 7:10pm - work - by waterproblem (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was talking to this guy that I like a lot and I think he likes me back. When he told me I was beautiful I laughed so hard that I farted. Loudly. FML

#2147101
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49477) - you deserved it (22234)

On 05/21/2009 at 3:13pm - love - by ECullen (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I walked to my local McDonald's. I spent the last 7 dollars I had on my meal. As I began to walk back to my dorm, I was mugged. I explained to them I had no money, so they stole my food. FML

#1936561
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42847) - you deserved it (2954)

On 05/14/2009 at 5:23pm - misc - by Aaron (man) - United States (Wisconsin)



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