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bottlesoupyog

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bottlesoupyog

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  • Number of visits : 53
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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bottlesoupyog's favorite FMLs

Today, my 8-year-old came home from school crying. Apparently her teacher told the whole class to write about how they felt when they learned that Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy weren't real. FML

#20942077
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52772) - you deserved it (5233)

On 11/02/2013 at 12:19am - kids - by SantaClaus - United States (California)

Today, I woke up with a raging hangover. I soon checked my phone, only to find that I'd drunkenly sent nude pictures to several friends' numbers, as well as to my own. I'd then replied to my own message, saying that I'm not gay and telling myself to fuck off. FML

#20925183
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26968) - you deserved it (38708)

On 10/18/2013 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was maced. Not by a person, but rather by one of those automatic air fresheners in the bathroom. It was conveniently placed at eye level, you know, for freshness. FML

#20921961
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39181) - you deserved it (2815)

On 10/15/2013 at 8:38pm - health - by erockinthesuburb (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, a week after my dad discovered Family Guy and started mindlessly repeating catchphrases from it 24/7, I finally lost my temper and told him how incredibly annoying it is. He just paused, turned to look me in the eyes, and said, "Shut up, Meg." FML

#20870528
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51514) - you deserved it (18758)

On 09/06/2013 at 6:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my mom broke the news that my dad secretly got married two months ago, to a woman he has been dating for 15 years, and that my parents have actually been divorced for 12 years. They just lied about it this whole time. FML

#20585943
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61817) - you deserved it (5418)

On 04/12/2013 at 1:11am - misc - by too young for this (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that my classmates hate me so much that they have a seating arrangement where people have to sit next to me on a rotating basis. A fight broke out yesterday because someone tried to skip their turn. FML

#20585229
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56984) - you deserved it (16032)

On 04/11/2013 at 4:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)

Today, my best friend was throwing me my bachelorette partly. A cop came by and said there have been complaints about the noise. Thinking he was the stripper we ordered, we pulled him into the house. He was an actual cop. FML

#20577218
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39676) - you deserved it (19411)

On 04/06/2013 at 8:55am - misc - by Evalynne - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my German Shepherd decided to bark at, then attack, a painted rock. At least I know I'm protected from inanimate objects. FML

#20561241
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27161) - you deserved it (3079)

On 03/26/2013 at 5:17pm - animals - by whykarma (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I have a heart condition that causes migraines and fainting, so I take salt tablets to stop the fainting. The migraines can lead to a stroke, so I have medication for them. The medication has a side effect: fainting. And to avoid migraines, I should avoid salt. FML

#20038541
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32139) - you deserved it (1581)

On 08/24/2012 at 12:08am - health - by Neurocardiogenic Syncope - Canada

Today, it was my first day working as a nightclub bartender. All through the evening, a really creepy bloke stood in a dark corner and leered at the girls on the dance floor. When I took the bouncer to one side to let him know, he told me the man was a coat stand. FML

#18554140
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11445) - you deserved it (28694)

On 12/19/2011 at 3:57pm - work - by Bob smith (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was driving my eight year-old son to school when a guy cut me off, prompting me to yell "douche bag" as a reflex out of the window. Realizing my mistake, I turned to my son and told him to never, ever talk like that. His response was, "Too late, douche bag." FML

#17966458
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11723) - you deserved it (41585)

On 10/12/2011 at 8:37am - kids - by John W. (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I tried to stop a teenage boy from entering the woman's bathroom. When he argued with me I had him thrown out. Turns out, according to their parents and driver's license, it was a girl. FML

#17780455
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10270) - you deserved it (39617)

On 09/19/2011 at 1:24pm - misc - by fluke - United States (Florida)

Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML

#17767423
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29449) - you deserved it (8239)

On 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm - kids - by awesomekidsmum - Canada (Ontario)



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