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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 3 July 1993 (22 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 450
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About bootytoo : Hello. just here to laugh

bootytoo's page activity

Visits<b>Shayn_25</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 4:10pm<b>SirVeldy</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 8:32pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 11:57am<b>zingline89</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 9:09pm<b>Rizzen</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 8:53pm<b>jonathanmoore</b> - the 08/06/2013 at 7:06pm<b>Thursdayxo</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 9:30pm<b>THE_Black_Jesus</b> - the 07/28/2013 at 6:49pm<b>Claytonioo</b> - the 07/19/2013 at 5:11am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 06/19/2013 at 5:03pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/22/2013 at 11:50am<b>NOLa_Dan</b> - the 05/22/2013 at 10:44am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 05/22/2013 at 10:03am<b>MiracleeLynn</b> - the 05/22/2013 at 5:04am<b>eMurpH</b> - the 05/16/2013 at 12:42pm<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 03/11/2013 at 5:01am

bootytoo's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!


You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of bootytoo's badges

bootytoo's favorite FMLs

Today, I was on the bus home from work when I felt something strange in my hair. I turned to look, and saw the old woman next to me sucking on the end of my hair. When she noticed me staring, she didn't stop but instead said, "So pretty. Can I have?" FML

Today, when I went out to get some groceries with my mother, a small girl came up to me and said I was an "ugly egg" because I'm a bald girl. I had to shave my head in order to have brain surgery to relieve me of the symptoms of my neurological disorder. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28756) - you deserved it (1462)

On 10/30/2015 at 9:43am - health - by an egg - United States (Michigan)

Today, my stomach growled so loud in class that a boy sitting next to me thought his phone had vibrated. FML


I agree, your life sucks (20453) - you deserved it (1900)

On 10/29/2015 at 11:21pm - misc - by qourt - United States

Today, I noticed a guy checking out my ass in the mirror behind the bar where I work. He was cute, so I thought I'd put on a little show. I bent over to reach for something near the floor, which caused me to let rip a series of uncontrollable farts, like popping bubble wrap. He quickly left. FML


I agree, your life sucks (23769) - you deserved it (9808)

On 10/20/2015 at 6:13am - love - by bubblewrap (woman) - United Kingdom (Swindon)

Today, my little cousin was helping me wash my car. After scrubbing all the dirt, I gave him the hose and said, "Okay, now rinse off this disgusting thing." He turned the hose on me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25296) - you deserved it (6380)

On 05/14/2015 at 12:26am - kids - by ptarr12345 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my dad drove me to the airport. As I got out of the car, he said, "You better pop that zit on your face, security might think it's a bomb". FML


I agree, your life sucks (31884) - you deserved it (3102)

On 05/08/2015 at 9:44am - misc - by brittrus - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I realized that my new haircut makes me look like a movie star. Not Scarlett Johansson, no. I look like Lord Farquaad. FML

Today, while studying for an exam, the neighbor's chihuahua started barking outside. After a few seconds, my mom yelled out for me to stop laughing. She honestly thought the barking was my laughter. FML


I agree, your life sucks (30727) - you deserved it (3243)

On 04/19/2015 at 1:09pm - animals - by woof? (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went on a date with a girl I like. Afterwards, I drove her home, and we just sat there awkwardly. I thought she wanted to kiss me but was nervous, so I jokingly said "What're you waiting for? Christmas?" I guess she took that as a "Get the hell out", because she broke into tears and left. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24237) - you deserved it (32246)

On 04/18/2015 at 10:38am - love - by fuck (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was cuddling in bed with my boyfriend when he started squeezing me as if I were a ketchup bottle. He said he wanted my period to end quicker, and he honestly thought that would work. FML

Today, I learned that my girlfriend is not a screamer nor a moaner, she's a biter. My arm is getting stitches right now. FML


I agree, your life sucks (31822) - you deserved it (3489)

On 04/13/2015 at 8:51pm - intimacy - by anon - United States

Today, my dogs freaked out and started getting violent because they thought the sound of my vibrator was the other's growling. FML


I agree, your life sucks (43816) - you deserved it (11116)

On 02/02/2014 at 4:50pm - animals - by foops (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I was playing with my dog, when she started sniffing my face. Jokingly, I got up and started to sniff her face back and asked "Yeah, how do you like that?" She replied by biting into my face. FML


I agree, your life sucks (27128) - you deserved it (33994)

On 12/15/2013 at 1:47am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I smelled chicken nuggets and asked my boyfriend if he was making some. He wasn't. It was my armpits. FML


I agree, your life sucks (23209) - you deserved it (41375)

On 09/30/2013 at 3:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went to a really important job interview. During it, I accidentally let out a burp, came down with nervous hiccups, and when I tried to quietly ease out some painful gas that was building up, it came out as a massive, rancid fart. I'll definitely be unemployed for a while yet. FML


I agree, your life sucks (43870) - you deserved it (9930)

On 09/27/2013 at 5:33pm - work - by ;_;" (woman) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

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