bonniebh

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bonniebh

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 1 January 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 300
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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bonniebh's page activity

Visits<b>97mailo</b> - the 12/21/2013 at 4:22pm<b>KiwiExchange</b> - the 08/05/2013 at 2:26pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 04/11/2013 at 10:09pm<b>naw</b> - the 04/05/2013 at 6:41am<b>flupsht</b> - the 02/04/2013 at 2:55am<b>olhuma</b> - the 01/24/2013 at 5:03am<b>Maddy9111</b> - the 01/24/2013 at 5:02am<b>B0SSAHOLIC</b> - the 01/22/2013 at 1:12am<b>Ramo_11</b> - the 01/22/2013 at 12:40am<b>adam86</b> - the 01/21/2013 at 6:50pm<b>acarlos18</b> - the 01/21/2013 at 3:35pm<b>come_at_me_bro_2</b> - the 01/21/2013 at 11:53am

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bonniebh's favorite FMLs

Today, my friends took my work laptop and changed the sounds. Now, whenever I remove a USB device, a woman's voice screams "Put it back!" and when I insert a USB device, it says "Oh, you need to push it in harder!" I don't know how to change it back. FML

by Anonymous / 07/20/2013 at 11:45am / United States (Delaware) / Work

Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML

by anonymous / 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm / United States (Hawaii) / Intimacy

Today, I watched The Passion of the Christ with my girlfriend. She kept scoffing at what she called the "historical inaccuracies", and actually tried to convince me that Hitler killed Jesus. When I corrected her, she looked at me, mouth agape, as if I was insane. FML

by and she doesn't even give bjs / 02/08/2013 at 7:44pm / Argentina (Distrito Federal) / Love

Today, I had to drag my grandmother out of a store because she went up to a black family and started apologizing for slavery. FML

by daddy's girl / 01/21/2013 at 11:08pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband asked me to show him my boob. I began to pull the side of my shirt down when he said, "No, not that one, the big one." FML

by sarah6786 / 01/21/2013 at 9:27pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, a bull escaped from the small farm down the street. It ended up in my yard and would not let me outside. I called animal control, who said, "We only deal with regular animals." FML

by bull-stuff / 01/17/2013 at 10:48pm / United States (South Carolina) / Animals

Today, I caught my boyfriend wearing yoga pants and taking pictures of his butt to post on a "Girls in yoga pants" site. He saw my expression and said, "Nah, it's cool, I hid my junk so they'll think it's a chick!" FML

by Amy / 01/10/2013 at 12:09am / United States / Intimacy

Today, when I was ordering pizza, I got a text from my mom saying "I love you". When the man thanked me I accidentally said, "I love you too." FML

by lol112 / 06/02/2012 at 8:47am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML

Today, my dad finally decided to give me the "sex talk." It was going fine until he said, "If you ever decide to have sex, picture my face like this" and pointed to his face, which had a creepy, intense stare. He just ruined sex for me. Forever. FML

by Aly / 12/09/2011 at 10:40am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my little brother came into my room and hit me over the head with his baseball bat. He then dropped the bat onto my floor and ran crying into my mother's room proclaiming I stole his bat and beat him with it for fun. FML

by NaomiMadison / 07/30/2011 at 1:15am / United States / Kids

Today, my new boyfriend was at my flat for the first time. He picked up something in the bathroom and said 'What the hell's this?'. I told him what it was for, and he said 'You girls and your weird female products. Who needs all this stuff?'. It wasn't a female thing. It was shampoo. FML

by cleangirl / 03/14/2011 at 7:45pm / United Kingdom (Fife) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized that our generation will be remembered as the kids who liked sparkly vampires. FML

by buhknee / 11/24/2009 at 7:08pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I ran into an old student of mine at the grocery store. She didn't recognize me at first so I introduced myself as her old teacher. She looked taken aback for a moment, and then said, "Oh my God... you're still alive?" FML

by feelinblue / 06/23/2009 at 7:31am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my students that I would be absent tomorrow because my wife was giving birth. They burst into applause... not to congratulate me on the new baby. FML

by spanishteach / 05/07/2009 at 10:50am / United States (New York) / Kids