bmon

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Offline (the 09/12/2015 at 11:53pm)

bmon

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3788
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About bmon : Baseball player. Living the dream. Feel free to message me.

bmon's page activity

Visits<b>cwowm</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 1:36am<b>Michelle1121</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 1:52am<b>karnnie</b> - the 09/06/2015 at 9:41pm<b>LiLMAMA0523</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 11:52am<b>softpaws</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 4:34am<b>Cynt3r</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 4:58pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 7:42pm<b>QueenJay81</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 6:22am<b>hurtfeet</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 9:03pm<b>pleasedie</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 8:59pm<b>Dougie_Bee</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 1:49pm<b>ElleHarding2701</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 3:33am<b>andits</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 5:00am<b>auctiongirl</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 4:03pm<b>horseh</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 7:44pm<b>Tarlachia</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 2:47pm<b>BBlah</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 8:43pm<b>Lebeaugars95</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 9:20am

Fucked!<b>Michelle1121</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 7:52am<b>LiLMAMA0523</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 5:52pm<b>QueenJay81</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 12:22pm

bmon's FML badges

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You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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bmon's favorite FMLs

Today, I was handing candy to a little boy who was trick or treating by himself. He was small enough to grab the candy and run past me into my house. I've been searching my house for two hours and still can't find him. I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML

by ananymous / 10/31/2012 at 11:04pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, a guy I've been seeing for a while sent me a link to a porn site, with the message, "Holy fuck, isn't this your mom?!" Thinking he was joking around, I clicked the link just to see what sick shit he wanted to show me. It was my mom. FML

by identitychangeplease / 09/19/2012 at 4:41pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML

by Anonymous / 09/14/2012 at 10:50am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, after my boyfriend and I had gotten frisky last night, I found a note on the front door of my building that read, "Dear girl in apartment 3D, from now on please close the blinds all the way or lose 30 pounds. Either would be acceptable." FML

by Anonymous / 08/10/2012 at 1:29am / Europe / Intimacy

Today, I told my son to go clean his mess of a room. He yelled, "Dobby has no master! Dobby is a free elf!" and walked off. He turned 18 a week ago. FML

by Anonymous / 07/25/2012 at 6:54am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, while cashiering at the drug store, I saw my ex-boyfriend, who I'm still completely in love with. Being the only cashier, I had to ring him up. He was buying condoms. FML

by tammy / 06/27/2012 at 1:05am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I was having a debate with my friend over tattoos. I used the example that you wouldn't put a bumper sticker on a Ferrari. He looked me in the eye and said, "Yeah, but you're no Ferrari. More like a Prius." FML

by kitty shah / 06/17/2012 at 1:01pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

by 16590 / 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm / Sweden / Transportation

Today, I went to see a movie with my girlfriend and a few others. Mid-way through, I noticed my girlfriend giving a hand-job to my best friend. I couldn't believe my eyes, and I confronted them. He claimed he had been asleep, she claimed she was mopping up a spill, and I'm now single again. FML

by aranya / 06/14/2012 at 6:51pm / Netherlands (Overijssel) / Intimacy

Today, my brother and I proposed to our girlfriends at the same time. We had perfect synchronization after practicing for days. My brother's girlfriend said yes, mine said no. FML

by emmmbo / 12/19/2011 at 10:40am / Australia (Western Australia) / Love

Today, I dressed up as Santa Claus for my employees' children. After seeing all the others, my daughter's turn arrived. She sat on my lap, put her lips to my ear, and whispered softly: "I want a new dad." FML

by perenoel / 12/03/2011 at 11:24am / France / Kids

Today, my eleven year old sister came in, and bitched to me and my boyfriend about how she was going to tell my mom about the used condom she found. My boyfriend punched her in the face. FML

by lolilovemyboyfriend / 10/19/2011 at 10:37am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, my 28-year-old brother who has been pranking me all my life, put a chocolate cupcake on my chair. I sat on it, with my white dress. On my wedding day. FML

by cupcake_butt / 10/17/2011 at 4:39am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my brother in law got into a fight with my husband. My pregnant sister was yelling at her husband to stop beating my husband up. When I came into the room, I asked why they were fighting. You'll never guess who the real father of my sister's baby is. FML

by Good sister / 10/13/2011 at 7:20pm / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, on my way home, my girlfriend started sexting me, telling me that she was waiting at my house. In my rush to get home to see her, I got pulled over and had to be patted down. He found no weapons, but he did find my stiffy. FML

by Username / 10/04/2011 at 8:02pm / United States / Intimacy