bmboente15

Search for a member

bmboente15

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3737
  • Number of comments : 81
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About bmboente15 : Hey, what's up, I'm a an old shemale prostitute and I work at a club called Déjà Vû in Minneapolis. You should totally hook up with me because I'm a hot fun beast! Rawrrrrrrrrr. I'm glad I took theses seconds out of your life because you are reading this.

More won't be bad

Call me.

bmboente15's page activity

Visits<b>TotallyNotAnna</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 2:52pm<b>10220706</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 9:09pm<b>am1717</b> - the 03/06/2016 at 7:37pm<b>yourmomshotfirst</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 9:03pm<b>crudeandrudeguy</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 9:45am<b>awobabobob</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 4:46pm<b>itslaelae</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 11:09am<b>Ahaddad123</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 1:39pm<b>BestOrginalName</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 7:47am<b>liloldme76</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 12:54am<b>UberAwesone</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 6:54pm<b>Kitten_love</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 2:47am<b>TheCutestLizard</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 11:21pm<b>russell1470</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 7:16pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 8:22am<b>luckygirl2522</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 7:23pm<b>garage</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 10:21pm<b>ThriceWritten</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 11:35pm

bmboente15's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

bmboente15's favorite FMLs

Today, my 4 year old daughter walked in while I was changing my shirt. She said "When I get older I am going to have big boobies just like you." I'm her dad. FML

by parentof5 / 04/23/2011 at 11:20am / United States / Kids

Today, at 5:30 in the morning while I was fast asleep, my cat decided the most threatening thing in my apartment that absolutely needed to be attacked was my left nipple. FML

by cdn_steed / 04/23/2011 at 9:11am / United States (New York) / Animals

Today, a stoned man tried to break into my house. Naked. FML

by Anonymous / 04/10/2011 at 2:05am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went into the women's bathroom and was warmly greeted by a man masturbating on one of the sinks. FML

by Jill / 04/09/2011 at 6:00pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I was walking in the park with my girlfriend, when out of nowhere, I was savaged and brutally humped into submission by a massive Great Dane. Not only did my girlfriend watch it all, but the dog's owner took the time to snap a few pictures with his phone. Neither bothered to help me. FML

by -_- / 03/28/2011 at 10:22pm / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, I was sitting beside a very cute girl on a 3 hour bus trip with my class. She fell asleep, head on my lap. She woke up because my erection was jabbing her in the cheek. FML

by dickface / 03/28/2011 at 4:13pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I was cooking, and I took a pot of boiling water to the sink to drain. My pot holder slipped, and the boiling water spilled all over my breasts. Second degree boob burns are bad, but losing half a nipple to potato salad is worse. FML

by ouchmytits / 03/28/2011 at 2:42am / United States (Mississippi) / Health

Today, I was sitting in Walmart and I saw an attractive woman walking by. Being the single guy I am, I went up to her and asked if she needed help with carrying her groceries. She responded with "You know I'm a guy right?" FML

by Anonymous / 03/26/2011 at 2:24am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I am taking a 16 hour flight. Five minutes in, the lady on one side has clipped her toenails onto me and the guy on the other side has the most horrific gas I have ever smelled. To help this problem he bought a cheese plate from the stewardess. 15 hours and 55 minutes to go. FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2011 at 2:36pm / United States (Georgia) / Transportation

Today, I have a cat with separation anxiety. By this, I mean whenever I go in another room and shut the door with her outside, she uses her head as a battering ram to try and break down the door. It's fun trying to sleep too. FML

by nosleeptilpissoff / 03/18/2011 at 11:54am / United States (Minnesota) / Animals

Today, I emailed my potential boss a copy of my résumé. However, I didn't realize until too late that it was my fake resume, created for an English class project. Some of my former jobs included being a certified gangster, as well as the former president of Canada. FML

by Almostfunny / 03/16/2011 at 9:01am / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, my mom caught me talking to my penis. FML

by eric / 03/16/2011 at 3:31am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I got a call from my five-year-old son's principal, my son had pooped in the school yard then gave the teacher a ziploc bag and commanded her to pick it up. He said he was trying to imitate our dog. FML

by anonymous / 03/15/2011 at 10:05pm / Kids

Today, I was answering a text from one of my students asking me if they could re-take a test. I thought I'd texted back "No, you can't." Auto correct had used a more frequently used word: "No, you cunt." FML

by Anonymous / 03/03/2011 at 6:22am / United States (California) / Work

Today, whilst having sex, my husband screamed out a man's name. FML

by fmlalways / 01/22/2011 at 8:00am / United Kingdom (Derbyshire) / Intimacy