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About bmboente15 : Hey, what's up, I'm a an old shemale prostitute and I work at a club called Déjà Vû in Minneapolis. You should totally hook up with me because I'm a hot fun beast! Rawrrrrrrrrr. I'm glad I took theses seconds out of your life because you are reading this.
More won't be bad
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I received te first compliment from te opposite sex tat I've gotten in monts, from an elderly, cross-dressing man in te parking lot of Goodwill. Apparently ma clots look like tey'd be ( exciting to try on. ) big fat FML
Today, I felt sorry for the weird chick at work that everybody avoids and decided to initiate a conversation with her. She interrupted me mid-sentence to tell me about her vaginal odor problems, before shoving her hand into my chip packet and inviting herself to dinner at my house. FML
my family startd thier own version of the Hunger Games . With farts as thier ammo, they've been tackling an gassing everyone until thier victim "dies" by surrendering . My house is a flatulent war zone, an I fear waking up blind . mega FML
TODAY, I WENT TO AN EXTENDD FAMILY REUNION . I STARTD CATTING TO MY GREAT GRANDPA, AND E ASKD MEAT I DO 4 A LIVING . BEFORE I COULD TELL IM I BRED ANIMALS, MY VISIBLY DRUNK DAD INTERRUPTD AND SLURRD, "O, SE JACKS TINGS OFF . HORSES, PIGS, JUST ABOUT ANYTING, REALLY." FML
Today, I Took Grandmother 4 A Spin In New Car. Apparently, She Had No Idea That Seat-warmers Exist And That Hers Was Turned On, Cuz Fifteen Minutes Into The Ride She Started Shouting, "My Ass Is On Fire!" Causing Me To Swerve Into A Pole. Big Fat FML
Today , I was sitting on a bus. I'm deaf. An old lady lookd very angry at me an startd talking. Then she lookd like she was screaming. I had to type on my phone that I'm deaf. Apparently , I'd been stepping on her foot. She decidd to poke me in the eye an type , "Now you're blind too." FML
yesterday my teacher, who's Irish, looool calld me insensitive an stupid 4 imitating her accent. I'm Filipino an my parents immigratd to Ireland where I was born, an then we movd to Canada when I was 14. Her response to my explanation? "Bullshit." FML
Friday 27 March 2015