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bmba94

Offline (the 03/24/2014 at 4:50am) | Search for a member

bmba94

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 10 September 1994 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3111
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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bmba94's page activity

Visits<b>chilldude69</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 10:44am<b>jelly_rolls</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 2:48am<b>samraae</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 1:41am<b>daffyduck16</b> - the 05/20/2014 at 11:28pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 5:37pm<b>Superdouchebag</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 12:59pm<b>pureportedpear</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 11:53am<b>izzybd</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 6:35pm<b>MichelleRuzicka</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 7:56pm<b>atl904</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 1:21am<b>Bree_mode</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 3:29pm<b>jaffvis</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 1:36pm<b>Mfroz</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 6:59pm<b>jazzybrar</b> - the 03/17/2014 at 4:53pm<b>jumper77</b> - the 02/28/2014 at 8:20am<b>DimiAmphetamine</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 5:08pm<b>SweetSwede</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 4:30am<b>Owlnight321</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 11:41pm

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bmba94's favorite FMLs

Today, my older brother managed to convince my younger sister that she's actually a boy, and that she'll soon be getting a penis in the mail, which she excitedly told everyone she could. He convinced me of the exact same thing as well several years ago. FML

#21174074
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43510) - you deserved it (6270)

On 06/14/2014 at 2:42am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I was out shopping with my mom. While we were walking, a guy in a car honked at me. I'm not used to compliments, so I was pretty flattered and flashed him a smile. He looked back at me, confused, then shook his head and pointed at my mom. FML

#21173638
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41623) - you deserved it (5407)

On 06/13/2014 at 7:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my dad called me into the bathroom, saying "Get a load of this shit, son" and forcing me to look at the biggest, foulest-smelling turd I have ever seen in my life in the toilet. It's been three hours and I still feel physically ill. FML

#21173465
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41674) - you deserved it (5300)

On 06/13/2014 at 4:17pm - health - by green and not with envy (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I took a look at my 9-year-old daughter's diary, thinking it would be full of cute stuff. Instead, it was full of hateful rants against me and my husband, as well the boys at her school, who she called gay because none of them ever hit on her. It seems I've failed as a parent. FML

#21171186
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44129) - you deserved it (17868)

On 06/11/2014 at 5:38pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was really hungry at work, and my stomach growled loudly. One of my co-workers heard it and thought it was a cat. Ashamed, I played dumb and we ended up spending twenty minutes looking for a cat that I knew didn't exist. FML

#21170120
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39909) - you deserved it (17436)

On 06/10/2014 at 9:01pm - animals - by imalosertho (woman) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I had to go to the police station after my son got arrested for shoplifting 15 packs of gum. He got away with it at first, but got busted when he tried to return it all because he "didn't like the flavor". FML

#21170087
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49149) - you deserved it (8209)

On 06/10/2014 at 8:39pm - kids - by idiotson - United States (New York)

Today, I sent my girlfriend a request to confirm our relationship on Facebook. She accepted, then changed her screen name into "His Hand". FML

#21169063
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50301) - you deserved it (10873)

On 06/10/2014 at 12:02am - love - by MiserableMan (man) - Vietnam (Ho Chi Minh)

Today, my husband and I put our children to bed a little earlier than usual, so we could have some sexy time. Immediately following my full-blown orgasm, I rolled over, only to see my wide-eyed son peeking over the top of the mattress. FML

#21133668
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57896) - you deserved it (13023)

On 05/07/2014 at 10:31pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I was trolling on a My Little Pony forum. I was midway through typing a big post, calling them all a bunch of attention-seeking losers who act like morons because their parents never loved them, when I broke down in tears, realizing I'd just perfectly described myself. FML

#21133397
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20491) - you deserved it (55544)

On 05/07/2014 at 5:25pm - misc - by I suck :( (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my best friend wanted to see what my new boyfriend looks like. By chance, he'd sent me a Snapchat a few minutes before, so I opened it to show her, only to see that it was a dick pic. FML

#21132642
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32862) - you deserved it (38782)

On 05/06/2014 at 7:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while working at Home Depot, a customer tried to engage me in a conversation about which gardening tool would "hypothetically" be the best to kill his wife with. FML

#21132614
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42277) - you deserved it (3432)

On 05/06/2014 at 6:47pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I met this overweight chick and ended up sleeping with her. We were doing it doggy style and it was great until she said, "Milk me like a cow." I can no longer drink milk without hearing that in my head. FML

#21132249
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48920) - you deserved it (18027)

On 05/06/2014 at 9:55am - intimacy - by chumman (man) - United States (New York)

Today, a bird got into the walls of my house through a hole. I located where it was by following the chirping and scratching sounds, and drilled a hole to get it out. I pulled out the drill, only to find the drill bit bloody. Suddenly, no more chirps. FML

#21131587
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48539) - you deserved it (16241)

On 05/05/2014 at 5:03pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I started going on and on about dogs and their different types of breed, behaviours, expectancy, etc. When someone asked me how I know all this stuff, I meant to say, "I fucking love animals", I didn't think it through and said, "I love fucking animals". FML

#21131182
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47) - you deserved it (17945)

On 05/05/2014 at 3:53am - intimacy - by Zekrome - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was glued to the toilet all day, gushing fountains of crap, due to my own bad cooking. It got so bad that I ran out of toilet paper and had to desperately jump in the shower and stay there for nearly two hours. I can't even feel my own asshole any more. FML

#21130490
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40608) - you deserved it (10276)

On 05/04/2014 at 1:17pm - health - by Numbass123 (man) - United States (Nevada)



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  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

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