Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About blunttobluntest : I'm a loud, spontaneous and a straight A student. I can fall under the category of being a nerd, but those who know me, know that I'm beyond a nerd.
I've got this weird wild edge and I admire people who can do things that I can't.
I am blunt, can be distinguished as a bitch if you piss me off, and I have a dream to start my own charity for women and children someday.
I have a thing for action movies; the X-Men series being my favourite.
I enjoy reading self-chosen books, watching movies, dancing, cooking, and partying. I'm a foodie and also a vegetarian (have been for all my life).
I can be overly sensitive at some things, but in others I can seem like a robot.
I'm Canadian by citizenship and Indian by birth. I love where I come from and I am highly in touch with my roots.
Anymore questions, don't ask me because I probably won't answer. I'm on my iTouch all the time.
Comments are better than the FMLs. True Story.
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today, my boyfriend started coming onto me, despite me being on my period. He said it was okay, and we went to his bedroom. He told me to spread my legs as he spread his hands. Thinking it'd be sexy, I did. He then yelled, "I AM MOSES! I PART THE RED SEA!" and broke down in laughter. FML
Today, while working my shift at Taco Bell, a creepy guy started flirting with me. He said, "You remind me of something," acting as if I knew him from elsewhere. I quickly said I used to work at Chili's. He shook his head and said, "No, not a person! An animal. A sloth maybe." FML
Today, I discovered that the neck injury that my mom has had since last week was planned just as an excuse not to shovel when today's snowstorm came. She has planned on being lazy for over a week now. FML
Today, I went to the store to pick up some feminine products. As I was paying, the male cashier looked at me sympathetically and asked if it was my girlfriend's time of the month. I'm a girl and was buying them for myself. FML
Today, I had to help my little sister do a first-grade project for school. For one part, they have to draw a picture of their role model. She drew a whale, and I asked, "A whale is your role model?" She laughed and said, "No! It's you!" FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend and one of his friends have been having sex with each other. His excuse? "She's my best friend, we do this all the time." I have been dating him for over a year. FML
Today, I parked next to a police officer's car in a bad part of town. When I got out, I saw a bag of pot on the ground between the cop's car and mine. When I pointed it out to him, he insisted it was mine and interrogated me to the point of tears. FML
Today, while on a crowded public bus, a cute girl asked if she could sit next to me. Problem is, I didn't hear correctly and thought she asked if anyone was sitting next to me. I answered no, causing her to walk off angrily and earning me several disgusted stares from other passengers. FML
Today, my wife finally came home from deployment. Apparently, in the military she really built up some muscle. When she saw me at the airport, she picked me up like a baby and spun me around in her arms a few times. I'm a little scared of her now. FML
Today, I went to a paintball match with a group of friends, one of whom brought his dad along. His dad is a weight-lifting, wannabe alpha male fucknut who thinks that chokeslamming opponents is a legitimate close-quarters paintball tactic. My broken shoulder disagrees. FML
Friday 24 October 2014