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blueridgemtns97

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blueridgemtns97

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  • Number of visits : 1163
  • Number of comments : 50
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

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blueridgemtns97's page activity

Visits<b>Zx_MaSsAcRe_xZ</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 2:47pm<b>Ren_Uchiha</b> - the 10/06/2013 at 12:46pm

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blueridgemtns97's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in bed with my boyfriend, in the middle of foreplay, and somehow out of my mouth came, "I want to be inside you." I'm a woman. FML

#9066532
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21089) - you deserved it (9132)

On 03/14/2010 at 3:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was eating a hotdog. My huge Siberian Husky, upon becoming aware of this, jumped up on me. He forced his tongue into my mouth and ate the food I was in the middle of eating. FML

Today, while on the bus, an old man told me about all the many things he wanted to do with my various orifices. FML

#8972575
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20580) - you deserved it (2242)

On 03/10/2010 at 2:54pm - intimacy - by robotchickens (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, a friend of mine sent me a message saying, "Man, I am so sorry but we were both really drunk and I swear it didn't mean anything." FML

#8654882
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23752) - you deserved it (3779)

On 02/26/2010 at 12:07am - misc - by single now - United States

Today, I just spent half an hour cleaning up my little brother's puke after he got drunk for the first time. All the people who bought him drinks are still out partying and having a good time, while all I can smell is whiskey, Chinese food, and whatever else was in his stomach. FML

#7120225
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22230) - you deserved it (2671)

On 01/03/2010 at 3:42am - misc - by always-the-responsible-one (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my mother confronted me about my bird's masturbation problem. We spent christmas eve googling "bird masturbating" and watching videos to see if that was actually what my bird was doing. At least he's having a good christmas. FML

#6933145
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23028) - you deserved it (2940)

On 12/25/2009 at 1:25am - animals - by suuuuuupucci (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that when an officer screams, "DON'T MOVE OR I'LL TASE YOU", it really means, "If you so much as flinch I'm going to shoot and 50,000 volts will be directed through your nose and groin." FML

#6785905
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24354) - you deserved it (10684)

On 12/16/2009 at 11:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I sneezed in the shower. When I got out, I got a text from my creepy old neighbor saying "Bless you". FML

#6563359
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48756) - you deserved it (3505)

On 12/02/2009 at 1:25am - misc - by errrmkl46 - United States (Arizona)

Today, I parked my convertible in the 5 minute bay at the post office. When I came back out I noticed a bum in the front seat pretending to drive it. After shouting at him and pulling him out, he stumbled off. I was then slapped with a ticket for being parked longer than 5 minutes. FML

#6309231
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24847) - you deserved it (5403)

On 11/15/2009 at 1:08am - misc - by John (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I wore my cool new shirt with an oriental character on it to class. The Chinese TA burst into laughter and told me the shirt read, "I am a sad, pathetic person." FML

#6301645
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10486) - you deserved it (36995)

On 11/14/2009 at 2:48pm - misc - by Molly (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I fell asleep in a lecture. I laughed at something amusing in Dreamworld, but the laugh came out as a prolonged creepy groan in Lectureworld. I woke up to see everyone within a 5 meter radius staring at me. FML

#6286266
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19220) - you deserved it (12092)

On 11/13/2009 at 10:53am - misc - by teepee - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)

Today, my dad's girlfriend threw me a birthday party and all the gifts, decorations, and the cake were according to my age, which they thought was 12. I turned 13 today. FML

#6253497
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32497) - you deserved it (7244)

On 11/11/2009 at 1:43am - misc - by Saphira (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was teaching a ten year old how to play piano. Halfway through the lesson, she made a minor mistake, which, trying to be a good tutor, I corrected her. She smiled up at me, paused, then slammed the key cover down onto my fingers. FML

#6245178
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36052) - you deserved it (2992)

On 11/10/2009 at 4:41pm - misc - by PiaNO (woman) - United Kingdom



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