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blueiceninja

Offline (the 01/26/2015 at 3:34pm) | Search for a member

blueiceninja

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1243
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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blueiceninja's page activity

Visits<b>FabCee</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 11:15am<b>Nordrag</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 1:07pm<b>Omegapi197</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 10:11pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 5:57pm<b>peacheso</b> - the 08/05/2013 at 1:14am

blueiceninja's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of blueiceninja's badges

blueiceninja's favorite FMLs

Today, during a family game of basketball, my 15 year old son shoved me hard to get the ball. I fell and cut my arm badly on the ground. I yelled at him for being an idiot. He replied "Oh jeez, a bleeding woman being a bitch, what a fucking shocker." My husband doubled over laughing. FML

#21342921
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34715) - you deserved it (6309)

On 01/23/2015 at 2:25pm - kids - by nosexforthee (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I met my new roommate. I hadn't even gotten her name yet, because the first thing she said to me instead was that she wanted to hang her confederate flag on the wall. I'm black. FML

#21326235
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35478) - you deserved it (4279)

On 12/29/2014 at 12:00am - misc - by okay17 - United States

Today, while walking home with my mom, some unoriginal cockshart in a passing car yelled at me: "Fuck her in the pussy!" It was a long, awkward walk home after that. FML

#21308349
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28851) - you deserved it (2488)

On 11/29/2014 at 8:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I get to add spaghetti sauce to my rather extensive list of things that don't belong in a person's eye but that end up in mine anyway. Other items include molten cheese, rock salt, orange juice, chips of nail polish, cotton fibers, and firework ash. FML

#21299049
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27217) - you deserved it (4293)

On 11/14/2014 at 4:58pm - health - by gspotter (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my dad told me that my mom wanted to name me something "unusual." He eventually got her to compromise. I go by Violet. I now know that my legal name is Purple. FML

#21292947
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36432) - you deserved it (2408)

On 11/05/2014 at 8:12pm - misc - by Purple (woman) - United States (California)

Today, trying to be a good role model for the kids behind me, I stopped and thoroughly checked both sides of the road before crossing. I still managed to get hit by a car. FML

#21287500
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34365) - you deserved it (6636)

On 10/29/2014 at 4:19am - kids - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I hit a new low point in my life when I stole batteries from a toy at the daycare I work at, and put them in my vibrator. FML

#21286701
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26188) - you deserved it (34270)

On 10/27/2014 at 11:40pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48716) - you deserved it (8867)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my new doctor gave me a breast exam and said everything was healthy, before adding "Well, I think so, anyway. I don't actually work here." As I freaked out, he laughed out loud, said he was just kidding, and that he should prescribe me a chill pill. FML

#21241090
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42160) - you deserved it (5978)

On 08/19/2014 at 4:46pm - health - by humdrummitydrum (woman) - United States

Today, as I awoke, the sun was shining, the birds were tweeting, and police sirens were wailing at a drug bust next door. FML

#21234535
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39657) - you deserved it (3448)

On 08/11/2014 at 1:11am - misc - by Ithoughtheywerenormalpeople (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband and I attended a funeral. After the service, my phone vibrated. It was a text from my husband, saying "I've got mourning wood like you wouldn't believe! get it? MOURNING. haha :D" I looked up and saw him across the room, winking at me. Not the place, honey. FML

#21234106
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48710) - you deserved it (5608)

On 08/10/2014 at 3:26pm - intimacy - by jackie89 (woman) - United Kingdom (Cornwall)

Today, my psychotic step-dad asked me if I'm doing drugs. I replied with a massive amount of sarcasm: "Yeah, all of 'em. Especially meth." He flipped out, searched my room top to bottom, then grounded me "for good" until I tell him where I hid the supposed drugs. FML

#21233273
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41027) - you deserved it (12597)

On 08/09/2014 at 1:32pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was doing a design sketch for work. I snapped a pic and sent it to my boss. She replied, "Impressive. Nice sketch too." I was drawing at home, naked. My dick was in the picture. FML

Today, it's my birthday. My next-door neighbours gave me a stool and some rope. FML

#21194564
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56215) - you deserved it (5211) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/01/2014 at 12:55am - love - by NosChersVoisins - France (Aquitaine)

Today, a guy at work pulled me aside to tell me that I probably shouldn't be working a job where I have to interact with customers, because of my autism. I don't have autism. FML

#21185267
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45752) - you deserved it (4199)

On 06/23/2014 at 12:19pm - work - by Badatlife (man) - Australia (New South Wales)



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